politicians

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politicians

Journalism over here is not only an obsession but a drawback that cannot be overrated. Politicians are frightened of the press, and in the same way as bull-fighting has a brutalizing effect upon Spain (of which she is unconscious), headlines of murder, rape, and rubbish, excite and demoralize the American public.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
My deepest feeling about politicians is that they are dangerous lunatics to be avoided when possible and carefully humored; people, above all, to whom one must never tell the truth.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Now, we deny not, but that politicians may sometimes abuse religion, and make it serve for the promoting of their own private interests and designs; which yet they could not do so well neither, were the thing itself a mere cheat and figment of their own, and had no reality at all in nature, nor anything solid at the bottom of it.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
There are more ideas on earth than intellectuals imagine. And these ideas are more active, stronger, more resistant, more passionate than politicians think. We have to be there at the birth of ideas, the bursting outward of their force: not in books expressing them, but in events manifesting this force, in struggles carried on around ideas, for or against them. Ideas do not rule the world. But it is because the world has ideas... that it is not passively ruled by those who are its leaders or those who would like to teach it, once and for all, what it must think.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
I do not deny that there may be other well-founded causes for the hatred which various classes feel toward politicians, but the main one seems to me that politicians are symbols of the fact that every class must take every other class into account.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Ninety percent of politicians give the other ten percent a bad reputation.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
It is hard to say why politicians are called servants, unless it is because a good one is hard to find.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
When philosophers try to be politicians they generally cease to be philosophers.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Successful democratic politicians are insecure and intimidated men. They advance politically only as they placate, appease, bribe, seduce, bamboozle, or otherwise manage to manipulate the demanding and threatening elements in their constituencies. The decisive consideration is not whether the proposition is good but whether it is popular -- not whether it will work well and prove itself but whether the active talking constituents like it immediately. Politicians rationalize this servitude by saying that in a democracy public men are the servants of the people.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Many politicians lay it down as a self-evident proposition, that no people ought to be free till they are fit to use their freedom. The maxim is worthy of the fool in the old story, who resolved not to go into the water till he had learned to swim.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The American mood, perhaps even the American character, has changed. There are few manifestations any longer of the old American self-assurance which so irritated Dickens. Instead, there is a sense of frustration so perceptible that even our politicians have attempted to exploit it.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
All histories do show, and wise politicians do hold it necessary that, for the well-governing of every Commonweal, it behoveth man to presuppose that all men are evil, and will declare themselves so to be when occasion is offered.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
I consider that women who are authors, lawyers, and politicians are monsters.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
We assume that politicians are without honor. We read their statements trying to crack the code. The scandals of their politics: not so much that men in high places lie, only that they do so with such indifference, so endlessly, still expecting to be believed. We are accustomed to the contempt inherent in the political lie.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The short memories of American voters is what keeps our politicians in office.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Writers and politicians are natural rivals. Both groups try to make the world in their own images; they fight for the same territory.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Everyone was tired with the old style politicians and their flowery rhetoric. I just told them there are tough times ahead, but that they would be less tough with me in charge.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
And he gave it for his opinion, that whoever could make two ears of corn, or two blades of grass, to grow upon a spot of ground where only one grew before, would deserve better of mankind, and do more essential service to his country, than the whole race of politicians put together.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
It never occurs to some politicians that Lincoln is worth imitating as well as quoting.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The last best hope of earth, two trillion dollars in debt, is spinning out of control, and all we can do is stare at a flickering cathode-ray tube as Ollie answers questions on TV while the press, resolutely irrelevant as ever, asks politicians if they have committed adultery. From V-J Day 1945 to this has been, my fellow countrymen, a perfect nightmare.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
If politicians and scientist were lazier, how much happier we should all be.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
I've said, these politicians that switched to Giuliani, they're all gonna get paid off. Read American history, Tammany Hall, Boss Tweed. You can't be stupid about where you live!More [04/06/2006 12:04:00]
In America, politicians do whatever to get re-elected, and a lot of decisions that were being made at that time by Kennedy were certain not to get him re-elected.More [11/03/2006 12:11:00]
“Kinky will get the politicians out of politics, but we need your help to get him on the ballot. Kinky has only a few weeks to collect over 45,000 signatures, and I'll be one of those signatures, and I hope you will, too.”More [11/13/2006 12:11:00]
“But I felt like Pablo Escobar felt like he was an honorable businessman. And when he killed people, I think he felt he did it because they were honorable. That they were liars and were trying to cheat him. I don't think he had a lot of respect for the politicians in Columbia at the time, so he had quite a lot of fun killing them.”More [12/29/2006 12:12:00]
Two-Face: One man is born a hero, his brother a coward. Babies starve, politicians grow fat. Holy men are martyred, and junkies grow legion. Why? Why, why, why, why, why? Luck! Blind, stupid, simple, doo-dah, clueless luck!More [03/19/2007 12:03:00]
Big Gay Al: Bombs are flying, people are dying, children are crying, politicians are lying too. Cancer is killing, Texaco's spilling, the whole world's gone to hell, but how are you?
[singing]
Big Gay Al: I'm super! Thanks for asking!More [05/03/2007 12:05:00]
Evey Hammond: My father was a writer. You would've liked him. He used to say that artists use lies to tell the truth, while politicians use them to cover the truth up.
V: A man after my own heart.More [05/21/2007 12:05:00]
Capt. Ramsey: At the Naval War College it was metallurgy and nulear reactors, not 19th-century philosophy.
[Stifled laugh]
Capt. Ramsey: "War is a continuation of politics by other means." Von Clausewitz.
Hunter: I think, sir, that what he was actually trying to say was a little more -
Capt. Ramsey: Complicated?
[Men Laughing]
Hunter: Yes the purpose of war is to serve a political end but hte true nature of war is to serve itself.
Capt. Ramsey: [Laughing] I'm very impressed. In other words, the sailor most likely to win the war is the one most willing to part company with the politicians and ignore everything except the destruction of the enemy. You'd agree with that.
Hunter: I'd agree that, um, that's what Clausewitz was trying to say.
Capt. Ramsey: But you wouldn't agree with it?
Hunter: No, sir, I do not. No, I just think that in the nuclear world the true enemy can't be destroyed.
Capt. Ramsey: [Chuckling, Tapping Glass] Attention on deck. Von Clausewitz will now tell us exactly who the real enemy is.
[Laughing]
Capt. Ramsey: Von?
[Men Laughing]
Hunter: In my humble opinion, in the nuclear world, the true enemy is war itselfMore [07/16/2007 12:07:00]
Mrs. White: You say you're used to being a hostess, as part of your husbands work?
Mrs. Peacock: Yes, it's an integral part of your life when you are the wife of a... oh, but then I forgot, we're not supposed to say who we really are, though heavens to Betsy. I don't know why.
Colonel Mustard: Don't you?
Mr. Green: I know who you are.
Miss Scarlet: Aren't you going to tell us?
Mrs. Peacock: How do you know who I am?
Mr. Green: I work in Washington too.
Professor Plum: Washington? So you're a politicians wife?
Mrs. Peacock: Yes, I am.
Colonel Mustard: Come on then, whose your husband?More [07/24/2007 12:07:00]
All politicians should have 3 hats - one to throw into the ring, one to talk through, and one to pull rabbits out of if elected.More [12/17/2007 12:12:00]
[During the final credits]
Sam Harris: Because it is taboo to criticize religious faith and any convictions born of religious faith, we have the spectacle - really, the travesty - of college-educated politicians endorsing social policies; to take one example, blocking stem cell research. We're impeding it, impeding its funding, at least on the basis of no evidence whatsoever, on the basis of metaphysical dogmas. In this case, the dogma that the soul enters the zygote at the moment of conception. And this leads people, who should know better, to stand on the floor of the Senate or in the Oval Office and speak, uh, First Century platitudes which are meant to serve as ethical arguments against what is undoubtedly one of the most promising lines of research in biology: to remediate a host of, you know, scores, potentially, of terrible, debilitating diseases.More [12/26/2007 12:12:00]
Emilio Barzini: [during a meeting with the Five Families] Times have changed. It's not like the Old Days, when we can do anything we want. A refusal is not the act of a friend. If Don Corleone had all the judges, and the politicians in New York, then he must share them, or let us others use them. He must let us draw the water from the well. Certainly he can present a bill for such services; after all... we are not Communists.More [12/26/2007 12:12:00]
Will: Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll take a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. Maybe I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never met, never had a no problem with get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Oh, Send in the marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some kid from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes back to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile he realizes the only reason he was over there in the first place was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And of course the oil companies used the skirmish over there to scare up domestic oil prices. A cute little ancillary benefit for them, but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back of course, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and fuckin' play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So now my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the fuckin' job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin' 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what did I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure fuck it, while I'm at it why not just shoot my buddy, take his job, give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president.More [01/01/2008 12:01:00]
What's new is that the White House itself has now been corporatized. It's not politicians working for the corporate interests. They are the corporate interests. That's where Bush came from, and Cheney and Rumsfeld.More [02/05/2008 12:02:00]
Too many terms corrupts politicians so they only want to be reelected.More [03/19/2008 12:03:00]
Eddie: In the Middle Ages everyone really had to worry about witches and goblins, but what we have is stuff eating at us. We've got stuff we don't even... I mean, why do you think that all the warlords of the world are so anxious to get their own personal little stash of chemical weapons. They call them weapons of mass destruction, but they're not. They're very *very* selective about what they destroy. They annihilate people and preserve things. They love things. You and I would be dead, gas... puke... gone. Whereas, you know, other earlier older people - the ancients - could look to the heavens, which in their minds was inhabited by this thoughtful, meditative, you know, maybe a trifle unpredictable and wrathful, but nevertheless up there - this divine onlooker. We've got anchorpersons and talking heads. We've got politicians who decide life and death issues on the basis of their media concerns. That's what we've got.More [04/05/2008 12:04:00]
[Father Jerry is returning the $10,000 Rocky has sent him 'anonymously' to help build the recreation center]



Rocky Sullivan:
Suppose the dough is hot? Nobody knows that but you and me.



Father Jerry:
That's just it.



Rocky Sullivan:
Oh, come on, don't be such an angel. You wanna get the center built, don't you? Well, go ahead - get it started.



Father Jerry:
Sure I wanna get it started; but I don't wanna get it started on rotten foundations.



Rocky Sullivan:
Aw, don't be a sucker!



Father Jerry:
All right, Rocky, supposin' I take the money... and I kid myself that it's a means to an end - well it isn't. It never will be. Inside the center my boys would be clean... and outside they'd be surrounded by the same rotten corruption and crime and criminals. Yes, yourself included. Criminals on all sides for my boys to look up to and revere... and respect and admire and imitate. What earthly good is it for me to teach that honesty is the best policy when all around they see that dishonesty is a better policy? That the hoodlum and the gangster is looked up to with the same respect as the successful businessman or the popular hero? You and the Fraziers and the Keefers and all the rest of those rotten politicians you've got in the palm of your hand. Yes, and you've got my boys, too. Whatever I teach them, you... you show me up. You show them the easiest way - the quickest way is with a racket or a gun.



Rocky Sullivan:
Well, it's so, ain't it?



Father Jerry:
Yes, it's so... God help us.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Mayor Hawkins:
Why, Bert. I feel slighted. I'd like to join, but nobody asked me.



Sourpuss Smithers:
I'm sorry, Mayor, but we voted that no politician could join.



Mrs. Hansen:
Just the John Does of the neighborhood because you know how politicians are.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Sheriff Trump:
Who are you?



U. S. Marshal Tim McCall:
United States Marshal McCall. Sandy Hopkins was an old pal of mine when he was in the service. I came here to find him and whoever it was who killed John Dodge.



Deputy Red:
[sarcastically] He's gonna be a lot of help, Sheriff. All you government fellows are alike. A bunch of politicians - thicker than thieves when you get together!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Dr. Serizawa:
If my device can serve a good purpose, i would announce it to everyone in the world! But in its current form, it's just a weapon of horrible destruction. Please understand, Ogata!



Hideto Ogata:
I understand. But if we don't use your device against Godzilla, what are we going to do?



Dr. Serizawa:
Ogata, if the oxygen destroyer is used even once, politicians from around the world will see it. Of course, they'll want to use it as a weapon. Bombs versus bombs, missiles versus missiles, and now a new superweapon to throw upon us all! As a scientist - no, as a human being - I can't allow that to happen! Am I right?



Hideto Ogata:
Then what do we do about the horror before us now? Should we just let it happen? If anyone can save us now, Serizawa, you're the only one! If... you use the device to defeat Godzilla, unless you reveal what you have done, who will know about it?



Dr. Serizawa:
Ogata, humans are weak animals. Even if I burn my notes, the secret will still be in my head. Until I die, how can I be sure I won't be forced by someone to make the device again?

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Joe Boyd:
What happens after I stop being a baseball player? Then where would I be?



Mr. Applegate:
[laughs] Well now, of course that's fairly well known.



Joe Boyd:
Yes, but I have...



Mr. Applegate:
After all, there's nothing unusual about it. How do you suppose some of these politicians around town got started? And parking lot owners?

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[at the site of his wife's grave]



Charlie Anderson:
I don't even know what to say to you any more, Martha. There's not much I can tell you about this war. It's like all wars, I guess. The undertakers are winning. And the politicians who talk about the glory of it. And the old men who talk about the need of it. And the soldiers, well, they just wanna go home. I guess you're not so lonely any more, with Ann and James and Jacob. And maybe the boy. You didn't know Ann, did you? Well, you'd like her. You'd like her, Martha. Why, she and James are so much alike, they're just like... no... no... we were never that much alike, were we Martha? We just sorta grew alike through the years. But I wish, I wish I could just know what you're thinking about it all, Martha. And maybe it wouldn't seem so bad to me if I knew what you thought about it.


[He notices the church bells are ringing]



Charlie Anderson:
You never give up, do you?

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Bill Dolworth:
The revolution? When the shooting stops, and the dead are buried, and the politicians take over, it all adds up to one thing: a lost cause.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Prince Yusupov:
We're going to be torn to pieces. You politicians think you're in control, but you'll be swept away like the rest of us. Rome, Athens, Petersburg, you can't stop it. In the meantime, I shall enjoy myself. Come to my place on Thursday, Rasputin. I'm having a special little party. This beautiful scarf, have it. I can't stop the revolution, but until it comes, let's have some fun. Even if it's only for a few more days.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Sollozzo:
Bene. Don Corleone. I need a man who has powerful friends. I need a million dollars in cash. I need Don Corleone and all of those politicians that you carry around in your pocket like so many nickels and dimes.



Don Corleone:
What is the interest for my family?



Sollozzo:
Thirty percent. In the first year your end should be 3, 4 million dollars and then it would go up.



Don Corleone:
And what is the interest for the Tattalgia family?



Sollozzo:
[to Tom] My compliments. I'll take care of the Tattalgia's, out of my share.



Don Corleone:
So, I am to receive thirty percent for finance, for legal protection and politcal influence, is that what you're telling me?



Sollozzo:
That's right.



Don Corleone:
Why come to me? What have I done to deserve such generousity?



Sollozzo:
If you consider a million dollars in cash merely finance... te salud Don Corleone.



Don Corleone:
I said that I would see you because I had heard that you were a serious man. A man to be treated with respect but I must say no to you and I will give you my reasons. It's true, I have a lot of friends in politics. But they wouldn't be so friendly if they knew my business was drugs instead of gambling which they consider a harmless vice but drugs, that's a dirty business.



Sollozzo:
Don Corleone...



Don Corleone:
It doesn't make any difference to me what a man does for a living, you understand, it's just that your business is a little dangerous.



Sollozzo:
If you're worried about security for your million the Tattaglia's will guarantee it.



Sonny:
Oh, now, are you telling me that the Tattaglia's guarantee our investment without...



Don Corleone:
Wait a minute... I have a sentimental weakness for my children and I spoil them as you can see. They talk when they should listen. Anyway, Signor Sollozzo, my no to you is final. I want to congratulate you on your new business and I'm sure you'll do very well and good luck to you. Especially since your interests don't conflict with mine. Thank you.


[Sollozzo leaves]



Don Corleone:
Santino! Come here. What's the matter with you? I think your brain's going soft with all that comedy you're playing with that young girl. Never tell anyone outside the Family what you're thinking again! Go on.



Don Corleone:
[looking a the flowers being brought in] What is... what is this nonsense?



Tom Hagen:
They're from Johnny. He's starring in that new film.



Don Corleone:
Take it away.



Tom Hagen:
Put it over there.



Don Corleone:
Tell Luca Brazi to come in.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Sir George Wheeler:
Even the best of politicians have to compromise sometimes.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Zeke Brown:
I take home two-ten a week man, goddamn. I gotta pay for the lights, gas, clothes, food... every fuckin' thing, man. I'm left with about thirty bucks after all the fuckin' bills are paid. Gimme a break, will ya mister?



Mr. Bird, I.R.S. Man:
Mister Brown, there's nothing I can do. I work for Uncle Sam . . .



Zeke Brown:
Fuck Uncle Sam, man! They give the fuckin' politicians a break! Agnew and 'em don't pay shit! Working man's gotta pay every goddamn thing!



Mr. Bird, I.R.S. Man:
You shouldn't say that about Uncle Sam . . .



Zeke Brown:
Don't point at me, you muthafucka! Get out my house! I'll pay the goddamn money!



Mr. Bird, I.R.S. Man:
[heads for the door] You bet you will, you'll pay it.



Zeke Brown:
Yeah I know I'll pay it! If I had the Navy and Marines behind me, I'd be a muthafucka too!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[aside]



Judge:
I hope you brought a toothbrush.



Judge:
[aloud] Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it is now my duty to advise you on how you should vote when you retire from this court. In the last few weeks we have all heard some pretty extraordinary allegations being made about one of the prettiest, about one of the most distinguished politicians ever to rise to high office in this country - or not, as you may think. We have heard, for example, from Mr Bex Bissell - a man who by his own admission is a liar, a humbug, a hypocrite, a vagabond, a loathsome spotted reptile and a self-confessed chicken strangler. You may choose, if you wish, to believe the transparent tissue of odious lies which streamed on and on from his disgusting, greedy, slavering lips. That is entirely a matter for you. Then we have been forced to listen to the pitiful whining of Mr Norma St.John Scott - a scrounger, parasite, pervert, a worm, a self-confessed player of the pink oboe; a man, or woman who by his, or her, own admission chews pillows! It would be hard to imagine, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, a more discredited and embittered man, a more unreliable witness upon whose testimony to convict a man who you may rightly think should have become Prime Minister of his country or President of the world. You may on the other hand choose to believe the evidence of Mrs Scott - in which case I can only say that you need psychiatric help of the type provided by the excellent Dr Gleadle. On the evidence of the so-called "hit man", Mr Olivia Newton-John, I would prefer to draw a discreet veil. He is, as we know, a man with a criminal past, but I like to think - ho, ho, ho - no criminal future. He is a piece of slimy refuse, unable to carry out the simplest murder plot without cocking it up, to the distress of many. On the other hand, you may think Mr Newton-John is one of the most intelligent, profound, sensitive and saintly personalities of our time. That is entirely a matter for you. I now turn to the evidence about the money and Mr Jack Haywire and Mr Nadir Rickshaw, neither of whom, as far as I can make out, are complete and utter crooks, though the latter in incontestably foreign and, you may well think, the very type to boil up foul-smelling biryanis at all hours of the night and keep you awake with his pagan limbo dancing. It is not contested by the defence that enormous sums of money flowed towards them in unusual ways. What happened to that money, we shall never know. But I put it to you, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, that there are a number of totally innocent ways in which that £20,000 could have been spent: on two tickets for Evita, a centre court seat at Wimbledon, or Mr Thrope may have decided simply to blow it all on a flutter on the Derby. That is his affair and it is not for us to pry. It will be a sad day for this country when a leading politician cannot spend his election expenses in any way he sees fit. One further point - you will probably have noticed that three of the defendants have very wisely chosen to exercise their inalienable right not to go into the witness box to answer a lot of impertinent questions. I will merely say that you are not to infer from this anything other than that they consider the evidence against them so flimsy that it was scarcely worth their while to rise from their seats and waste their breath denying these ludicrous charges. In closing, I would like to pay tribute to Mr Thrope's husband, Miriam, who has stood by him throughout this long and unnecessary ordeal. I know you will join me in wishing them well for a long and happy future. And now, being mindful of the fact that the Prudential Cup begins on Saturday, putting all such thoughts from your mind, you are now to retire - as indeed should I - you are now to retire, carefully to consider your verdict of "Not Guilty".

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Thornton Melon:
Oh, you left out a bunch of stuff.



Dr. Phillip Barbay:
Oh really? Like what for instance?



Thornton Melon:
First of all you're going to have to grease the local politicians for the sudden zoning problems that always come up. Then there's the kickbacks to the carpenters, and if you plan on using any cement in this building I'm sure the teamsters would like to have a little chat with ya, and that'll cost ya. Oh and don't forget a little something for the building inspectors. Then there's long term costs such as waste disposal. I don't know if you're familiar with who runs that business but I assure you it's not the boyscouts.



Dr. Phillip Barbay:
That will be quite enough, Mr. Melon! Maybe bribes, kickbacks and Mafia payoffs are how YOU do business! But they are NOT part of the legitimate business world! And they are certainly not part of anything I am doing in this class. Do I make myself clear, Mr. Melon!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Ivan Danko:
I have car under control.



Art Ridzik:
Yeah, I'm sure they taught you all about cars and the price of insurance at your famous Russian school in Kiev!



Ivan Danko:
In socialist countries, insurance not necessary. State pays for everything.



Art Ridzik:
Yeah? Well, tell me something, Captain. If you've got such a fucking paradise over there, how come you're up the same creek as we are with heroin and cocaine?



Ivan Danko:
Chinese find way. Right after revolution, they round up all drug dealers, all drug addicts, take them to public square, and shoot them in back of head.



Art Ridzik:
Ah, it'd never work here. Fucking politicians wouldn't go for it.



Ivan Danko:
Shoot them first.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
William H. Bonney:
Murphy's taking inventory in Tunstall's store right now and you're saying that means nothing to you?



Chavez:
It means nothing to me? Murphy and his politicians have taken more blood from me than they ever will from you.



William H. Bonney:
How do you figure?



Chavez:
The Red Sands Creek Reservation. 200 people butchered in the snow with their stomachs empty. My mother's people. You see, Murphy was under government contract to supply us with beef, but two winters ago, he sent only rotten meat. No corn, no flour, just rancid beef crawling with worms. A few of my men and I set out to a camp in the middle of the night to try and get food. Oh yeah, they welcomed us in, and then they fired at us. I got away, only me. But when I got back to the Red Sands, I found out that the army had already heard about our big indian uprising and they paid us back. My mother was cut by a saber from her privates to her neck. My sisters were just babies, and they had their heads bashed in with boot heels so the army could save bullets. Everyone at the reservation was butchered AND IT MEANS NOTHING TO ME? Oh yeah, I went into Lincoln to take Murphy's head. And that's when John Tunstall found me, and he took me in, and he taught me a better way to bury Murphy.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Harold Green:
I cannot believe the government continues to pay politicians after they die.



Red Green:
Well, it's so hard for them to tell, Harold.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Chief Kennedy:
[after reading Noseworthy's report and the witness statements] You will rewrite this piece of pornography! I can't send something like this out! You will remove all references to sexual matters, is that understood?



Detective Noseworthy:
I didn't make this stuff up, Chief! Those are sworn statements made by the boys.



Chief Kennedy:
You get orders. I get orders. Now the case is closed!


[Noseworthy prepares to leave]



Chief Kennedy:
This comes straight from the Department of Justice! There are to be no arrests! Apparently the brothers involved will be sent somewhere for treatment.



Detective Noseworthy:
I told the little kid he wouldn't be buggered anymore. What do I tell him now? That the High Holy Church and a bunch of criminal politicians don't give a damn about him!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[the mob is attempting to hang Dexter Lexcannon]



Singing Fisherman:
[to Dexter] You won't be lonesome, son, there's lots of politicians where you're going.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Ray Vecchio:
He's got so many politicians in his pocket he walks with a limp.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
L.D.:
I'm giving them entry-level positions into the only growth-sector occupation that's truly open to them right now. That's the substance supply industry. They gonna run this shit someday. They gonna have the whole empire. Man, y'all don't give a fuck about it. You greedy-ass politicians. That's what you tell me every time that y'all vote to cut them school programs; every time y'all vote to cut them funds to the job programs. What the fuck; how a... how a young man gonna take care of his financial responsibilities workin' at motherfuckin' Burger King? He ain't. He ain't, and please don't even start with the school shit. They ain't no education goin' on up in that motherfucker. 'Cause y'all motherfuckin' politicians done fucked the shit up. So what they gonna do? What's a young man supposed to do then, right? What's he gonna do? He gonna come to me, that's what he's gonna do. Why? 'Cause I'm a businessman, and as a businessman, you gotta limit your liabilities. And that's what these shorties offer me: limited liabilities; because of their limited vulnerability to legal sanctions, man. It's the same fuckin' thing in politics, Dog. You find an edge, you gotta exploit that shit. That's why y'all sent all them motherfuckin' teenagers to Iraq. Die over some motherfuckin' oil money. Send the motherfuckin' CIA up in the 'hood with all the fuckin yayos. Slangin' in the hood man. It's the same shit in politics.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Will:
Why shouldn't I work for the N.S.A.? That's a tough one, but I'll take a shot. Say I'm working at N.S.A. Somebody puts a code on my desk, something nobody else can break. Maybe I take a shot at it and maybe I break it. And I'm real happy with myself, 'cause I did my job well. But maybe that code was the location of some rebel army in North Africa or the Middle East. Once they have that location, they bomb the village where the rebels were hiding and fifteen hundred people I never met, never had no problem with, get killed. Now the politicians are sayin', "Oh, send in the Marines to secure the area" 'cause they don't give a shit. It won't be their kid over there, gettin' shot. Just like it wasn't them when their number got called, 'cause they were pullin' a tour in the National Guard. It'll be some kid from Southie takin' shrapnel in the ass. And he comes back to find that the plant he used to work at got exported to the country he just got back from. And the guy who put the shrapnel in his ass got his old job, 'cause he'll work for fifteen cents a day and no bathroom breaks. Meanwhile, he realizes the only reason he was over there in the first place was so we could install a government that would sell us oil at a good price. And, of course, the oil companies used the skirmish over there to scare up domestic oil prices. A cute little ancillary benefit for them, but it ain't helping my buddy at two-fifty a gallon. And they're takin' their sweet time bringin' the oil back, of course, and maybe even took the liberty of hiring an alcoholic skipper who likes to drink martinis and fuckin' play slalom with the icebergs, and it ain't too long 'til he hits one, spills the oil and kills all the sea life in the North Atlantic. So now my buddy's out of work and he can't afford to drive, so he's got to walk to the fuckin' job interviews, which sucks 'cause the shrapnel in his ass is givin' him chronic hemorrhoids. And meanwhile he's starvin', 'cause every time he tries to get a bite to eat, the only blue plate special they're servin' is North Atlantic scrod with Quaker State. So what did I think? I'm holdin' out for somethin' better. I figure fuck it, while I'm at it why not just shoot my buddy, take his job, give it to his sworn enemy, hike up gas prices, bomb a village, club a baby seal, hit the hash pipe and join the National Guard? I could be elected president.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Jon Stewart:
See, the thing is, we need your help. Right now, you're helping the politicians and the corporations. And we're left out there to mow our lawns.



Co-Host:
By beating up on them? You just said we're too rough on them when they make mistakes.



Jon Stewart:
No, no, no, you're not too rough on them. You're part of their strategies. You are partisan, what do you call it, hacks.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Co-Host:
When politicians come on...



Jon Stewart:
Yes.



Co-Host:
It's nice to get them to try and answer the question. And in order to do that, we try and ask them pointed questions. I want to contrast our questions with some questions you asked John Kerry recently... up on the screen.



Jon Stewart:
If you want to compare your show to a comedy show, you're more than welcome to.



Co-Host:
No, no, no, here's the point.



Jon Stewart:
If that's your goal.



Co-Host:
It's not.



Jon Stewart:
I wouldn't aim for us. I'd aim for "Seinfeld." That's a very good show.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]

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