university

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university

The most important function of the university in an age of reason is to protect reason from itself.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
What poor education I have received has been gained in the University of Life.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
After all manner of professors have done their best for us, the place we are to get knowledge is in books. The true university of these days is a collection of books.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The true university of these days is a collection of books.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
A university is what a college becomes when the faculty loses interest in students.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
It makes little difference how many university courses or degrees a person may own. If he cannot use words to move an idea from one point to another, his education is incomplete.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
A university should be a place of light, of liberty, and of learning.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Books in a large university library system: 2, 000,000. Books in an average large city library: 1 0,000. Average number of books in a chain bookstore: 30, 000. Books in an average neighborhood branch library: 20, 000.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The medieval university looked backwards; it professed to be a storehouse of old knowledge. The modern university looks forward, and is a factory of new knowledge.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
I am told that today rather more than 60 per cent of the men who go to university go on a Government grant. This is a new class that has entered upon the scene. It is the white-collar proletariat. They do not go to university to acquire culture but to get a job, and when they have got one, scamp it. They have no manners and are woefully unable to deal with any social predicament. Their idea of a celebration is to go to a public house and drink six beers. They are mean, malicious and envious . They are scum.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
A man who has never gone to school may steal from a freight car; but if he has a university education, he may steal the whole railroad.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Looking back over a decade one sees the ideal of a university become a myth, a vision, a meadow lark among the smoke stacks. Yet perhaps it is there at Princeton, only more elusive than under the skies of the Prussian Rhineland or Oxfordshire; or perhaps some men come upon it suddenly and possess it, while others wander forever outside. Even these seek in vain through middle age for any corner of the republic that preserves so much of what is fair, gracious, charming and honorable in American life.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The exquisite art of idleness, one of the most important things that any University can teach.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Mr. Finkle: What do you know about Ray Finkle?
[Ace sucks in a huge breath of air]
Ace Ventura: Soccer style kicker graduated from Cauler high June 1976, Stetson University honors graduate class of 1980, holds 2 NCAA division 1 records one for most points in a season, one for distance, former nickname "The Mule," The first and only pro athlete to come out of Cauler County and one hell of a model American.
Mr. Finkle: Are you another one of those "Hard Copy" guys?
Ace Ventura: No Sir, I'm just a very big Finkle fan, This is my Graceland. More [07/21/2005 12:07:00]
Paul: Look, it's a school of whales.
Ringo: They look a little bit old for school.
Paul: University then.
Ringo: University of whales.
John: They look like drop-outs to me.More [10/12/2005 12:10:00]
But the bad side is that people judge you. They say, 'Model...blonde...big breasts...bimbo!' If they bothered to talk to me, they'd learn that I've been to university and can speak five languages: English and German fluently and Dutch, Italian and Japanese conversationally.More [03/27/2006 12:03:00]
[An attorney for Ladner said yesterday that he could not comment on the statement.] I haven't seen it. Someone on the board has obviously leaked it to the press but withheld it from Dr. Ladner, so he cannot respond, ... It is very disappointing that members of the board would harm the university by continuing a constant series of leaks that distort the truth.More [04/28/2006 12:04:00]
And on top of that, my dad is a professor of literature so he's very, very smart. So I was always thinking, 'How I can aspire to be him?' There was this intimidating aura growing up with a university professor.More [05/25/2006 12:05:00]
I learned how to sign because when I was growing up in California in order to get into college you needed two semesters of language to get into a University of California school.More [06/21/2006 12:06:00]
I have a university degree in kinesiology and worked in a physiotherapy clinic. I also worked at the human performance lab at York University testing lead athletes and was writing a book with a professor when I started fitness modeling, and acting sprouted from that.More [10/15/2006 12:10:00]
I had seen some theater and really loved it. So I began studying acting at the University of Oklahoma, and then I went on to CalArts for a couple of years.More [10/30/2006 12:10:00]
I did, although I didn't read from page 1 to page 187 but I read chunks of it. I did a little bit of science when I was in the university so I was able to understand the graphs and pie charts and stuff like that. It was extremely dry.More [11/24/2006 12:11:00]
For the last year I've been at Stanford University as a student and I've had time to read the newspaper.More [01/17/2007 12:01:00]
Effete Man in Gay Bar: [referring to Kinsey] Mary here says he's from the University of Indiana and she'd like to interview me about my "sex history".
Effete Man's Friend: Tell him to stick around and watch.More [04/02/2007 12:04:00]
Sherlock Holmes: Just have a quick look at these.
[hands Lestrade two obituaries]
Lestrade: A suicide and a carriage accident.
Sherlock Holmes: I suspect foul play.
Lestrade: Why? The two instances are completely unrelated.
Sherlock Holmes: Wrong. Both men graduated from the same university in 1809.
Lestrade: Coincidence.
Sherlock Holmes: Neither of their deaths fit their personalities. According to his obituary, Bobster was a happy man, content with his life, his career, his family. Why would he commit suicide? He didn't even leave a note. And Reverend Nesbitt is described by friends as "warm, loving, peaceful." And yet the carriage driver insists that he was crazed, insane, in a state of panic when he ran out into the street.
Lestrade: Holmes, a mere fluctuation of character is hardly sufficient evidence to begin an investigation. And if you want my advice, you'll keep your nose out of the Times and into your schoolbooks.
Sherlock Holmes: I appreciate your time, Mister Lestrade. I suggest you hold onto these.
[Lestrade shakes his head]
Sherlock Holmes: If I were a detective sergeant trapped in this room all day up to my neck in boring paperwork, I would be doing everything in my power to seek out that one case, that one investigation that would promote me to inspector.
Lestrade: [Irately] Good day, Holmes.More [05/10/2007 12:05:00]
Ugo: I find that Sonia most appealing.
Cammille B.: I don't doubt it. Thanks to you, that dinner was a catastrophe.
Ugo: I don't agree. I had a good time.
Cammille B.: Not me.
Ugo: Why not?
Cammille B.: I was ashamed of you. I was ashamed all evening.
Ugo: I'm sorry. I'm an actor, not a university professor.
Cammille B.: Don't be a hypocrite. Taking that superior air, it's unbearable!More [05/21/2007 12:05:00]
[Voice Over]
Mrs. Clack: My sister did not live passed her 23rd birthday. A group of men raped and killed her. They stuffed her in a dumpster three blocks from our apartment.
August Nicholson: My brother worked in an emergency room downtown. A drug addict came in with a wound to his ribs. My brother tried to dress the wound. He pulled a gun from his jacket and he shot my brother through his left eye.
Alice Hunt: My husband, Michael, left for the supermarket at a quarter past 9 in the morning. He was found with no money and no clothes in the East River three days later.
Edward Walker: My father was shot by a business partner who then hanged himself in my father's closet. They had argued over money. I am a professor. I teach American History at the University of Pennsylvania. I have an idea that I would like to talk to you about.More [05/30/2007 12:05:00]
[Promoting active liberty does not mean allowing the majority to run roughshod over minorities. It calls for taking special care that all groups have a chance to fully participate in society and the political process. Discussing the recent University of Michigan affirmative action cases, Justice Breyer contrasts an opinion by Clarence Thomas, arguing that the Equal Protection Clause requires government actions to be] colorblind, long denied full citizenship.More [07/02/2007 12:07:00]
[last lines]
Danielle: You, sir, are supposed to be charming.
Henry: And we, princess, are supposed to live happily ever after.
Danielle: Says who?
Henry: You know, I don't know.
Grand Dame: [voiceover] My great-great-grandmother's portrait hung in the university up until the Revolution. By then, the truth of their romance had been reduced to a simple fairy tale. And, while Cinderella and her prince did live happily ever after, the point, gentlemen, is that they lived.More [10/18/2007 12:10:00]
[last lines]
Grand Dame: My great-great-grandmother's portrait hung in the University up until the Revolution. By then, the truth of their romance had been reduced to a simple fairy tale. And while Cinderella and her Prince *did* live happily ever after, the point, gentlemen, is that they *lived*.More [10/18/2007 12:10:00]
Joan of Arc is my namesake. I played her character while still in my teens, at a music festival held at the University of Colorado in Boulder.More [12/07/2007 12:12:00]
[Longstreet is briefing the commanders before the final charge]
Brig. Gen. J. Johnston Pettigrew: Johnston Pettigrew, University of North Carolina.
Lt. Gen. James Longstreet: Yes, General; your fame as a scholar precedes you. They still speak of your grades at North Carolina with reverence and awe. I understand you've written a book.
Brig. Gen. J. Johnston Pettigrew: A minor work; if the General would care to read it...
Lt. Gen. James Longstreet: Yes, General, I would like that very much.
Brig. Gen. J. Johnston Pettigrew: Captain, fetch a copy of my book from the wagon.
Lt. Gen. James Longstreet: Excuse me, General, but I don't think I will have time to read it today.More [12/12/2007 12:12:00]
Dean Yeager: This university will no longer continue any funding of any kind for your group's activities.
Dr. Peter Venkman: But the kids love us.More [12/14/2007 12:12:00]
Dr Ray Stantz: Hey, Dean Yeager! Are you moving us to a better office on campus?
Dean Yeager: No, you're being moved off campus. The Board of Regents has decided to terminate your grant. You are to vacate these premises immediately.
Dr Ray Stantz: What?
Dean Yeager: This university will no longer continue any funding for any of your group's activities.
Dr. Peter Venkman: This is preposterous. I demand an explanation.
Dean Yeager: Doctor... Venkman. The purpose of science is to serve mankind. You seem to regard science as some kind of dodge... or hustle. Your theories are the worst kind of popular tripe, your methods are sloppy, and your conclusions are highly questionable! You are a poor scientist, Dr. Venkman!
Dr. Peter Venkman: I see.
Dean Yeager: And you have no place in this department, or this university.More [12/14/2007 12:12:00]
Sean: Hey, Gerry, In the 1960's there was a young man that graduated from the University of Michigan. Did some brilliant work in mathematics. Specifically bounded harmonic functions. Then he went on to Berkeley. He was assistant professor. Showed amazing potential. Then he moved to Montana, and blew the competition away.
Lambeau: Yeah, so who was he?
Sean: Ted Kaczynski.
Lambeau: Haven't heard of him.
Sean: Hey, Timmy!
Tim: Yo.
Sean: Who's Ted Kaczynski?
Tim: Unabomber.More [01/01/2008 12:01:00]
Hedwig: I got kicked out of university after delivering a brilliant lecture on the aggressive influence of German philosophy on rock and roll entitled "You, Kant, Always Get What You Want".More [03/05/2008 12:03:00]
Hedwig: One day in the late mid-eighties, I was in my early late-twenties. I had just been dismissed from University after delivering a brilliant lecture on the aggressive influence of German philosophy on rock'n'roll entitled 'You, Kant, Always Get What You Want.' At 26, my academic career was over, I had never kissed a boy, and I was still sleeping with mom. Such were the thoughts flooding my tiny head on the day that I was sunning myself... in an old bomb crater I had discovered near the Wall. I am naked. Facedown, on a broken piece of church, inhaling a fragrant westerly breeze. The new McDonald's has just gone up on the other side... my God I deserve a break today. All I ever get is the unhappy meal.More [03/05/2008 12:03:00]
Narrator: Police Constable Nicholas Angel: born and schooled in London, graduated Canterbury University in 1993 with a double first in Politics and Sociology. Attended Hendon College of Police Training and displayed great aptitude in field exercises, notably Urban Pacification and Riot Control. Academically excelled in theoretical course work and final year examinations. Received a Baton of Honour, graduated with distinction into the Metropolitan Police Service and quickly established an effectiveness and popularity within the community. Proceeded to improve skill base with courses in advanced driving and advanced cycling. He became heavily involved in a number of extra-vocational activities and to this day, he holds the Met record for the hundred meter dash. In 2001, he began active duty with the renowned SO19 Armed Response Unit and received a Bravery Award for efforts in the resolution of Operation Crackdown. In the last twelve months, he has received nine special commendations, achieved highest arrest record for any officer in the Met and sustained three injuries in the line of duty, most recently in December when wounded by a man dressed as Father Christmas.More [03/28/2008 12:03:00]
I went to the High School for Performing Arts, and to Howard University on a talent scholarship.More [04/14/2008 12:04:00]
Brian Kessler: I'd always wanted to be a writer, but there's a big difference between writing a magazine article and writing a book. I know I wrote a magazine article. Everything I ever wanted to know about serial killers fit nicely on those four pages. The article got me a book deal with a little cash up front, but between the rent and the convertible the advance was gone. I owed a book and I was stuck. What little I knew about seial killers I learned in a university library. The only thing I knew for certain was that people didn't kill each other in libraries.More [05/21/2008 12:05:00]
I know somebody from university who's called Phil Collins and I think there's something terribly unfortunate about sharing a name With somebody who either is famous or becomes famous.More [10/15/2008 12:10:00]
Muldoon:
What can you tell me about Mr. Niles' Business?



Perelli:
He ain't got a business. It's a dodge. No credit rating. Dropped from his university club for non-payment of dues. Still owes a food and liquor bill of hundred and ten dollars and eighty three cents.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Peter Boyd:
You're no dope, Jane. You couldn't be. You haven't a university degree and you don't teach logic.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
William 'Bill' Sherman:
The University of Indiana. I'm a senior.



Marjorie 'Marjie' Winfield:
Oh, it must be wonderful.



William 'Bill' Sherman:
It's a farce. All the fellas' are interested in is playing football and baseball, and women. Women and more women. Can you think of a bigger waste of time?



Marjorie 'Marjie' Winfield:
What's wrong with baseball?



William 'Bill' Sherman:
Baseball! It's the national insanity. At a time like this when, when civilization is crumbling beneath our feet, our generation is playing baseball, and singing songs like...



Chorus:
[sings in the background] We were sailing along / On Moonlight Bay



William 'Bill' Sherman:
We were sailing along, on Moonlight Bay. Isn't that silly?



Marjorie 'Marjie' Winfield:
I rather liked it.



William 'Bill' Sherman:
Have you heard the rest of it?


[sings]



William 'Bill' Sherman:
You have stolen her heart / Now, don't go away. As we sang love's old sweet song on Moonlight Bay.


[back to speaking]



William 'Bill' Sherman:
That musta been written by a man with a glass of beer in one hand and a rhyming dictionary in the other.



Marjorie 'Marjie' Winfield:
Oh, I think it's beautiful.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[to Kate Roberts in University Hospital]



Nancy Wesley:
I guess even whores get demoted.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Mark Wallace:
Are you a virgin?


[Joanna seems shocked by the question]



Mark Wallace:
I was for two years at the University of Chicago.



Joanna Wallace:
Studying virgin detection?

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
King Friday XIII:
I feel like reciting the royal version of Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star.



Lady Aberlin:
Oh, please do if you will, Uncle.



King Friday XIII:
Certainly, yes. Scintillate, Scintillate diminutive stellar orb. How inexplicable to me seems this stupendous problem of your existance. Elevated at such at an imeasurable distance, in an apparently perpendicular direction from this terrestrial planet which we occupy. Resembling in thy dazzeling and unapproachable efulgance, a gem of purist carbon, set solitaire in a university of space.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Henry Stamper:
Why don't you show us some of that university learnin'... say something to us in trigonometry. Go on! Say something to us in trigonom'.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Hugh:
I think the Hugh Simon theory will stand the test of time.



Judy:
Exactly what *is* that theory Mr Simon?



Hugh:
I doubt you are qualified to understand it but it says that the 16th and 17th century composers developed a uniform scale platform based upon the intervals utilised in the mountaineer yodel.



Judy:
And you developed this theory? That should come as a shock to Professor Findelmeyer.



Hugh:
I don't know what you're talking about.



Judy:
Sure you do, the Findelmeyer Proposition.



Hugh:
I don't know what you're talking about, besides that has never been translated.



Judy:
Just once. Harvard Musicological review, 1925. It's probably out of print now...



Frederick Larrabee:
Of course! Professor Heinrich Findelmeyer, the university of Zurich, 1911, the controversial Findelmeyer Proposition, no wonder it sounded so familiar. I'm sorry Simon


[rips up the grant check]



Hugh:
This is despicable.



Frederick Larrabee:
Hugh, you're a bad loser, you're a plagiarist and you're nasty. I don't like you and I want you to go away.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Dean:
We're expanding. This will be the biggest university on the west coast.



Professor:
But we're on the east coast.



Dean:
That's how big I want it to be.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Major Eaton:
Doctor Jones, we've heard a lot about you.



Indiana:
Have you.



Major Eaton:
Professor of Archeology. Expert on the occult and how does one say it? Obtainer of rare antiquities.



Indiana:
That's one way of saying it. Why don't you sit down you'll be more comfortable.



Colonel Musgrove:
Yes, you're a man of many talents.



Major Eaton:
Now, you studied under Professor Ravenwood at the University of Chicago.



Indiana:
Yes, I did.



Major Eaton:
You have no idea of his present whereabouts?



Indiana:
Only rumors really. Somewhere in Asia, I think. I haven't really spoken to him in 10 years. We were friends once but we had a bit of a falling out, I'm afraid.



Colonel Musgrove:
Now, Doctor Jones, you must understand that this is all completely confidential.



Indiana:
I understand.



Colonel Musgrove:
Yesterday afternoon our European section intercepted a German communique that was sent from Cairo to Berlin.



Major Eaton:
You see for the last two years the Nazis have had teams of archeologists running around the world looking for all sorts of religious artifacts. Hitler's gone nuts on the subject. He's crazy. He's obsessed with the occult. And right now, apparently, there is some kind of German archeological dig going on in the desert outside Cairo.



Colonel Musgrove:
Now we have some information here but we can't make anything out of it and maybe you can. "Tannis development proceeding. Acquire headpeace, Staff of Ra, Abner Ravenwood, US."



Indiana:
The Nazis have discovered Tannis!



Major Eaton:
Now just what does that mean to you? Tannis.



Indiana:
Tannis is one of the possible resting places of the Lost Ark.



Colonel Musgrove:
The Lost Ark?



Indiana:
Yeah, the Ark of the Covenant. The chest the Hebrews used to carry the 10 Commandments around in.



Major Eaton:
Alright, now, what do you mean the 10 Commandments, you talking about THE 10 Commandments?



Indiana:
Yes, the actual 10 Commandments the original stone tablets that Moses came down out of Mount Horeb and smashed if you believe in that sort of thing. Didn't you guys ever go to Sunday School? Look, the Hebrews took the broken pieces and put them into the Ark. When they settled in Cainan they put the Ark in a place called The Temple of Solomon where it stayed for many years. 'Till all of the sudden, whoosh, it was gone.



Major Eaton:
Where?



Indiana:
Nobody knows where or when.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Bill Cosby:
My wife and I were intellectuals before we had children. We were very, very bright people. My wife graduated from the University of Maryland, child psychology major with a B-plus average, which means that if you ask her a question about a child's behavior, she will give you at least an 85 answer. I, from Temple University, physical education major with a child psychology minor, which means that if you ask me a question about a child's behavior, I will tell you to tell the child to take a lap.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[after Joel's Princeton interview]



Lana:
So, how're we doin'?



Joel Goodson:
Looks like University of Illinois!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Joel Goodson:
Looks like the University of Illinois!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Dr Ray Stantz:
Hey, Dean Yeager! Are you moving us to a better office on campus?



Dean Yeager:
No, you're being moved off campus. The Board of Regents has decided to terminate your grant. You are to vacate these premises immediately.



Dr Ray Stantz:
What?



Dr. Peter Venkman:
This is preposterous. I demand an explanation.



Dean Yeager:
This university will no longer continue any funding for any of your group's activities.



Dr. Peter Venkman:
But the kids love us!



Dean Yeager:
Doctor... Venkman. The purpose of science is to serve mankind. You seem to regard science as some kind of dodge... or hustle. Your theories are the worst kind of popular tripe, your methods are sloppy, and your conclusions are highly questionable! You are a poor scientist, Dr. Venkman!



Dr. Peter Venkman:
I see.



Dean Yeager:
And you have no place in this department, or this university.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Marty DiBergi:
You two were at school together?



Nigel Tufnel:
We're not university material.



David St. Hubbins:
What's that on your finger?



Nigel Tufnel:
It's my gum.



David St. Hubbins:
What are you doing with it on your finger?



Nigel Tufnel:
I might need it later.



David St. Hubbins:
Put it on the table, that's terrible.



Nigel Tufnel:
No, I might forget it on the table.



David St. Hubbins:
[to Marty] Fucking awful, you can't take him anywhere.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Hillary Flammond:
Only a year ago, I was teaching a course in black history at the University of Blaupunkt.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Narrator:
The title 'Geshe' literally means spiritual friend, and is granted as recognition for high academic achievement in philosophy and metaphysics. The Geshe has completed studies in 5 subjects and would be comparable to a university professor. - But Buddhist study is not solely oriented towards scholarship. It also includes an inner development towards wisdom and enlightenment.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
James Leeds:
[talking to Sarah while she is in the university swimming pool after hours] You are the most mysterious, beautiful, angry person I have ever met. I am falling in l...


[Sarah quickly backs away from the pool ledge, clearly uneasy]



James Leeds:
Sarah... Sarah! I am falling... into the pool with you!


[falls forward into pool]

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Lucas:
Are you referring to the size of my penis?



Bruno:
Yeah, I am.



Lucas:
With a flaccid penis, it's the number of folds that count. Besides, I'm not semi-erect like some of you guys here.



Bruno:
What did you say?



Lucas:
A University of Chicago study. You can tell the fags in a warm shower by who's got the longest dong. Hey, yours seems to be growing even now.



Bruno:
The hell it is!



Lucas:
It IS, look!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]

« Page 1 from 30, showing 1 - 60 from 1797 »

Quotes of the month

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