novel

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novel

The writer has a grudge against society, which he documents with accounts of unsatisfying sex, unrealized ambition, unmitigated loneliness, and a sense of local and global distress. The square, overpopulation, the bourgeois, the bomb and the cocktail party are variously identified as sources of the grudge. There follows a little obscenity here, a dash of philosophy there, considerable whining overall, and a modern satirical novel is born.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The traditional novel form continues to enlarge our experience in those very areas where the wide-angle lens and the Cinema screen tend to narrow it.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Novelists are perhaps the last people in the world to be entrusted with opinions. The nature of a novel is that it has no opinions, only the dialectic of contrary views, some of which, all of which, may be untenable and even silly. A novelist should not be too intelligent either, although he may be permitted to be an intellectual.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
A novel points out that the world consists entirely of exceptions.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The great American novel has not only already been written, it has already been rejected.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
If I were a writer, how I would enjoy being told the novel is dead. How liberating to work in the margins, outside a central perception. You are the ghoul of literature. Lovely.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Sir Walter, with his 61 years of life, although he never wrote a novel until he was over 40, had, fortunately for the world, a longer working career than most of his brethren.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Writing a novel without being asked seems a bit like having a baby when you have nowhere to live.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The final test for a novel will be our affection for it, as it is the test of our friends, and of anything else which we cannot define.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Writing a novel is not merely going on a shopping expedition across the border to an unreal land: it is hours and years spent in the factories, the streets, the cathedrals of the imagination.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
By its very nature, the novel indicates that we are becoming. There is no final solution. There is no last word.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
When writing a novel a writer should create living people; people not characters. A character is a caricature.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The novel is more of a whisper, whereas the stage is a shout.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
If we could sniff or swallow something that would, for five or six hours each day, abolish our solitude as individuals, atone us with our fellows in a glowing exaltation of affection and make life in all its aspects seem not only worth living, but divinely beautiful and significant, and if this heavenly, world-transfiguring drug were of such a kind that we could wake up next morning with a clear head and an undamaged constitution -- then, it seems to me, all our problems (and not merely the one small problem of discovering a novel pleasure) would be wholly solved and earth would become paradise.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The only reason for the existence of a novel is that it does attempt to represent life.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The present era grabs everything that was ever written in order to transform it into films, TV programs; or cartoons. What is essential in a novel is precisely what can only be expressed in a novel, and so every adaptation contains nothing but the non-essential. If a person is still crazy enough to write novels nowadays and wants to protect them, he has to write them in such a way that they cannot be adapted, in other words, in such a way that they cannot be retold.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
No matter how ephemeral it is, a novel is something, while despair is nothing.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
A novel must be exceptionally good to live as long as the average cat.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Research is usually a policeman stopping a novel from progressing.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
For a Jewish Puritan of the middle class, the novel is serious, the novel is work, the novel is conscientious application -- why, the novel is practically the retail business all over again.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The first sentence of every novel should be: Trust me, this will take time but there is order here, very faint, very human. Meander if you want to get to town.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
This is not a novel to be tossed aside lightly. It should be thrown with great force.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
We have unprecedented conditions to deal with and novel adjustments to make -- there can be no doubt of that. We also have a great stock of scientific knowledge unknown to our grandfathers with which to operate. So novel are the conditions, so copious the knowledge, that we must undertake the arduous task of reconsidering a great part of the opinions about man and his relations to his fellow men which have been handed down to us by previous generations who lived in far other conditions and possessed far less information about the world and themselves. We have, however, first to create an unprecedented attitude of mind to cope with unprecedented conditions, and to utilize unprecedented knowledge.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
The novel does not seek to establish a privileged language but it insists upon the freedom to portray and analyze the struggle between the different contestants for such privileges.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
A novel is a mirror carried along a main road.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
He will hold thee, when his passion shall have spent its novel force, something better than his dog, a little dearer than his horse.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
In the West audiences think I am a stereotyped action star, or that I always play hitmen or killers. But in Hong Kong, I did a lot of comedy, many dramatic films, and most of all, romantic roles, lots of love stories. I was like a romance novel hero.More [04/18/2006 12:04:00]
My first film goes into production in October. It's called White Boy Shuffle and it's based on a novel about a young black kid and it's sort of reminiscent of Catcher in the Rye.More [06/09/2006 12:06:00]
I hadn't read the novel Bleak House . I'd read Dickens, but not this novel. I'd read several of his great novels, though I think it's different if you read them when you're young. You appreciate the storytelling, the stand-out characters, but you don't appreciate his ability as a writer, the depth of his humanity. He writes about everything, the rich, the poor, the prisons, the law courts, the country houses, the orphans and the families. I read the script for Bleak House and I was tentative about it. I'd told the producers, 'I don't do television.' But they charmed me and I did actually read the novel. I was captivated.More [11/04/2006 12:11:00]
I'm at the outline stage now of a third novel and I'm trying to keep it brighter.More [11/05/2006 12:11:00]
Nancy Kendricks: We're totally screwed, right?
Alex Rose: I would say screwed is apt.
Nancy Kendricks: Do you think that Jean would ever give you a second chance?
Alex Rose: No. It's over. Besides, how could I have time to rewrite my novel and still do my faithful servant duty to her as her little indentured servant person. Her little butt boy. I got a lot of duties honey. She might need me to go out and count grapes with her or go help her fix her heater or go take her to the laundry or I gotta go help her clean her banana skins and I gotta go help her clean out her garbage and I gotta go help her fiddle her monthlies out or go and wipe her ass! God forbid she should have any shit hanging off her ass!
Nancy Kendricks: Alex.
Alex Rose: No, really. Cause then I gotta run up there double time like a little bunny and I gotta go up there with my little tissue and I gotta go wipe her little ass and then I gotta go, "Oh, good for you Mrs. Connelly. Good for you for having such a nice little poopy. Oh, what's that? You got some poopy on your dipy? Oh, then, let me go clean it off with my tongue!" I mean enough is enough!More [08/09/2007 12:08:00]
I'm not constrained by being a genre writer. Any story I can imagine, I can cast as a fantasy novel and probably get it published.More [09/06/2007 12:09:00]
I've read short stories that are as dense as a 19th century novel and novels that really are short stories filled with a lot of helium.More [09/06/2007 12:09:00]
The actual process of selling my first novel was exciting at the time. I was no longer an apprentice but had become a journeyman.More [09/06/2007 12:09:00]
Henry Fool: It's a philosophy. A poetics. A politics, if you will. A literature of protest. A novel of ideas. A pornographic magazine of truly comic book proportions. It is, in the end, whatever the hell I want it to be. And when I'm through with it it's going to blow a hole this wide straight through the world's own idea of itself.
[bottles breaking]
Henry Fool: They're throwing bottles at your house. Come on. Let's go break their arms.More [03/08/2008 12:03:00]
Robert: I'm writing a novel myself, a lot of people say that, but in my case it's true.More [07/21/2008 12:07:00]
Lady Gertrude Allwyn:
The story is from a novel entitled Lavender and Old Lace, but the name of the cinema has been changed to... um... She Done Him Plenty.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Klara Novak (Miss Novak):
All my knowledge came from books, and I'd just finished a novel about a glamorous French actress from the Comedie Francaise. That's the theater in France. When she wanted to arouse a man's interest, she treated him like a dog.



Alfred Kralik:
Yes, well, you treated me like a dog.



Klara Novak (Miss Novak):
Yes, but instead of licking my hand, you barked.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Schoolteacher:
[watching a Nazi bookburning] I'm writing a novel myself. I'd be very disappointed if you gentlemen don't burn it.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Edna Stokes Cadman:
How do you like that? I feel like a cheap novel in a circulating library.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Katrin Hanson:
[reading the novel that she's just finished] "For long as I could remember, the house on the Larkin Street Hill had been home. Papa and Mama had both born in Norway but they came to San Francisco because Mama's sisters were here, all of us were born here. Nels, the oldest and the only boy, my sister Christine and the littlest sister Dagmar but first and foremost I remember Mama".

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Ethel Mertz:
What are you writing about?



Lucy Ricardo:
I'm writing about things I know.



Ethel Mertz:
That won't be a novel that will be a short story

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Bugs Bunny:
So I'm me again. What a novel idea. Sure you wouldn't like to turn me into a grasshopper or something?


[paint brush appears]



Bugs Bunny:
No, no, I take it back.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Dick Avery:
Every girl on every page of Quality has grace, elegance, and pizzazz. Now what's wrong with bringing out a girl who has character, spirit, and intelligence?



Dovitch:
That certainly would be novel in a fashion magazine.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Rita Littlewood:
[about Norris's secret book] The hero of his novel has got himself caught up in a menage-a-trois!



Emily Nugent:
Oh, really!



Rita Littlewood:
Emily, you do know what a menage-a-trois is?



Emily Nugent:
I most certainly do!



Rita Littlewood:
Oh. Well, the two women involved in this...



Emily Nugent:
Love triangle?



Rita Littlewood:
Yes. Are a mild-mannered church-goer called Emilia...



Emily Nugent:
[subtly shocked] Oh.



Rita Littlewood:
...and a racy, Titian temptress called Reeba.



Emily Nugent:
[suspicious] Oh.



Rita Littlewood:
[reading from the novel] "Norris jumped out of the moped as Emilia and Reeba alighted the side-car...”



Emily Nugent:
That's a big side-car!



Rita Littlewood:
"... and hand in hand, the three of them ran barefoot through Chester Zoo. Atop the souvenir kiosk, Reeba belts out a quick rendition of "Paper Moon", whilst Emilia chose this moment - for some solemn prayer."



Emily Nugent:
It's not really a page-turner, is it?



Rita Littlewood:
You wait till you hear what happens in the meercat enclosure!



Emily Nugent:
I like meercats... I've a tea towel with some on - Norris knows that!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
William Terrence 'Billy' Fisher:
Today's a day of big decisions - going to start writing me novel - 2000 words every day, going to start getting up in the morning.


[Looks at his overgrown thumb nail]



William Terrence 'Billy' Fisher:
I'll cut that for a start. Yes... today's a day of big decisions.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Peter Marshall:
Arthur Hailey had a very successful movie and novel called "Hotel". He has a new best seller about another stopover point. What is it called?



Charley Weaver:
Service Station.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Miss Chloe Moon:
You know, Butch, I'm very uncomfortable.



Edward Lionheart:
"Bring forth that sorceress condemned to burn." That's from Henry the Sixth, duckie, part one. It's a very interesting play, don't you agree, Miss Moon? Particularly that scene where Joan of Arc gets burnt at the stake.


[removing his disguise]



Edward Lionheart:
Though you may find our novel version a bit of a shock.


[she struggles, but he ties her down and heads towards an electric switch]



Edward Lionheart:
Spare for no fagots, let there be enough: Place barrels of pitch upon the fatal stake, That so her torture may be shortened.


[he suddenly cranks the electric up]



Edward Lionheart:
And yet, forsooth, she is a virgin pure. Strumpet, thy words condemn thy brat and thee: Use no entreaty, for it is in vain. Break thou in pieces and consume to ashes, Thou foul accursed minister of hell!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Zab:
I'll be a son-of-a-bitch. My mother sold my novel to Hollywood for Humphrey Bogart and Edward G. Robinson.



Vinci:
[doing a Robinson imitation] Hey, how much?



Zab:
For fifteen thousand bucks!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[after reading Joan's new novel based on her adventure]



Gloria:
Joanie, you are now a WORLD-CLASS hopeless romantic.



Joan Wilder:
No, hopeful. Hopeful romantic.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Dorothy:
Well Blanche is certainly taking her sister's novel better than I would. I would kill my sister Gloria if she ever wrote about my sex life.



Sophia:
You would kill your sister over a pamphlet?

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Peter Rokeby:
[posing in front of the mirror] Before writing the Great Mancunian Novel, Peter Rokeby was an advertising copywriter, he is married with children and lives in a house... somewhere off the North circular.


[alters pose]



Peter Rokeby:
Before writing the Great Mancunian Novel Peter Rokeby was a lumberjack, an Olympic raftsman and a Freedom fighter in Angola...


[realises Sally has walked in]



Peter Rokeby:
I'm just practicing the book jacket.



Sally Rokeby:
Perhaps you should try writing the book.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Bernadette:
[to Tick] Oh, that's a novel idea. Let's stuff ourselves to death. Imagine the headlines: "Whales Beach Themselves In The Outback". "Mystery Bum Sticks Dead In Drag".

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Issac Geldheart:
You think I'm going to publish some trashy novel by some slicko hipster?

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Nick Beam:
The point is that, even if you wanted to rob a place, there are smarter ways to do it!



T. Paul:
Enlighten me.



Nick Beam:
A mask. Wear a mask. You see, the police have this thing called "a lineup", and if anybody recognizes you, YOU GO TO JAIL! Or how's this for a novel idea? Case the place first. Find out if there's a security camera, or a hidden alarm. Then again, why even rob a convenience store? How much money could you possibly get? Two, three hundred dollars? You're set for two days, wow!



T. Paul:
What do you know, lanky?



Nick Beam:
I know you go for the big score. One robbery, you're set.



T. Paul:
News flash, big slim: people with big money, they protect it!



Nick Beam:
So you do a little research. Take Quality Design Group, where I work. My boss keeps a ton of cash in his vault. At night there's only two guards, and a personal security system. And in this case, I even happen to know the code! But even if I didn't, I...


[stops and stares]



T. Paul:
What? I got a booger in my nose?



Nick Beam:
[imitating Phillip] "Diversify! You can't trust banks, Nick. The whole economy could crumble at any second." That bastard's so heavily leveraged it would wipe him out.



T. Paul:
What, am I hearing you right? Mr. High-and-Mighty's gonna rob his boss? You hear that, gila monsters? Old Nick Beam here's gonna rob his boss! I say, do you hear that, gila monsters? You know what, Nick? Your wife really messed your head up bad, man.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[as they leave, Eric points to the novel in Ernie's hand]



Eric:
How does it end? It's been right so far!



Ernie:
Well, it's compleately wrong now - it says the villian gets away scot free!


[hands book to Eric]

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Ms. Perky:
Nine schools in ten years. My, my. Army brat?



Cameron:
Yeah, my-my dad is, uh...



Ms. Perky:
That's enough. I'm sure you won't find Padua any different than your old schools. Same little asswipe shit-for-brains everywhere.



Cameron:
Excuse me? D-Did you just say... Am I in the right office?



Ms. Perky:
Not any more you're not. I've got deviants to see and a novel to finish. Now scoot. Scoot!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[to Brian]



Stewie Griffin:
How you uh, how you comin' on that novel you're working on? Huh? Got a a big, uh, big stack of papers there? Got a, got a nice litte story you're working on there? Your big novel you've been working on for three years? Huh? Got a, got a compelling protagonist? Yeah? Got a obstacle for him to overcome? Huh? Got a story brewing there? Working on, working on that for quite some time? Huh? Yeah, talking about that three years ago. Been working on that the whole time? Nice little narrative? Beginning, middle, and end? Some friends become enemies, some enemies become friends? At the end your main character is richer from the experience? Yeah? Yeah? No, no, you deserve some time off.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Peter McGowen:
...but maybe that's everything in writing - a catchy title.



Debra Salhany:
So is that why you decided to call your first novel How to Kill Your Neighbor's Dog?



Peter McGowen:
Oh, that isn't mere affectation. That's a practical guidebook full of juicy bits on suburban terrorism.



Debra Salhany:
...but, uh, what if somebody reads this and goes out and kills their neighbor's dog?



Peter McGowen:
Oh, well, what are you gonna do?

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Tristan:
And she's reading again. How novel.



Rory:
Good-bye, Tristan.



Tristan:
Did you get the novel thing? Because...



Rory:
I said good-bye.



Tristan:
What are you doing here?



Rory:
I like lines.



Tristan:
The guy's supposed to buy the tickets.



Rory:
Really. Does Susan Faludi know about this?



Tristan:
Unless of course there is no guy.



Rory:
There's a guy



Tristan:
A Cheap guy.



Rory:
Well, what can I say? I like 'em cheap. Sloppy too - bald spot, beer gut, you know, and the pants that kind of slip down in the back, giving you that good plumber shot. That sends me through the roof.



Tristan:
So who is he?



Rory:
How many languages can you say 'none of your business' in.



Tristan:
Does he go to this school?



Rory:
No, he doesn't.



Tristan:
Uh-huh. Well, look, OK, I'll confess something to you. I don't have a date.



Rory:
Well I hear Squeaky Fromme is up for parole soon. You should keep a good thought.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]

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