Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981]

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Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981]

[Winger's girlfriend is leaving him]



John Winger:
You can't go! All the plants are gonna *die*!

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
Ma'am, I'm sure there are a lot of ways I've gone that you haven't.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
My philosophy: a hundred-dollar shine on a three-dollar pair of shoes.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
Oh, it's not the speed really so much, I just wish I hadn't drunk all that cough syrup this morning.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[after a shoe shine]



John Winger:
I don't think I've ever been this happy.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[after stumbling on the sidewalk]



Captain Stillman:
Have that removed.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Dewey Oxburger:
Well, my name's Dewey Oxburger. My friends call me Ox. I dont know if you've noticed, but I got a slight weight problem.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
We're all very different people. We're not Watusi, we're not Spartans, we're Americans. With a capital "A", huh? And you know what that means? Do you? That means that our forefathers were kicked out of every decent country in the world. We are the wretched refuse. We're the underdog. We're mutts.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Dewey Oxburger:
[as he gets off the bus at camp, to Capt. Stillman] How's it going, Eisenhower?

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
[to the soldiers in his platoon] We're soldiers; but we're American soldiers. We've been kickin' ass for 200 years. We're 10 and 1.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Russell Ziskey:
John, do you think I'm officer material?



John Winger:
God, I'm worried about you.



Russell Ziskey:
Come on! I'm in good shape, I'm walking tall, I'm looking good. First weekend in Europe.



John Winger:
Yeah. We're spending it in an airplane hangar... guarding a truck!



Russell Ziskey:
We've got each other.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Sergeant Hulka:
Okay, Mr. Push-ups, let's hear your story.



John Winger:
Chicks dig me, because I rarely wear underwear and when I do it's usually something unusual. But now I know why I have always lost women to guys like you. I mean, it's not just the uniform. It's the stories that you tell. So much fun and imagination.


[points to the soldier next to him]



John Winger:
Lee Harvey, you are a madman. When you stole that cow, and your friend tried to make it with the cow. I want to party with you, cowboy. If the two of us together, forget it. I'm gonna go out on a limb here. I'm gonna volunteer my leadership to this platoon. An army without leaders is like a foot without a big toe. And Sergeant Hulka is always gonna be here to be that big toe for us. I think that we owe a big round of applause to our newest, bestest buddy, and big toe... Sergeant Hulka.


[the soldiers start clapping]



Sergeant Hulka:
Well, okay, hotshot. We're gonna see what kind of soldier you are.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
General Barnicke:
Where is your drill sergeant, men?



John Winger:
Blown up, sir!



Soldiers:
Blown up, sir!

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
General Barnicke:
Where have you been soldier?



John Winger:
Training, sir.



Soldiers:
Training, sir.



General Barnicke:
What kind of training?



John Winger:
Army training, sir.



Soldiers:
Army training, sir.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
General Barnicke:
Are you telling me that you men finished your training on your own?



John Winger:
That's a fact, Jack.



Soldiers:
That's a fact, Jack.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
Don't order the Schnitzel, they're using Schnauzer.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
Tito Puente's gonna be dead, and you're gonna say, "Oh, I've been listening to him for years, and I think he's fabulous."

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
I've had an interesting morning. In the last two hours I've lost my job, my apartment, my car, and my girlfriend.



Russell Ziskey:
You still have your health.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Sergeant Hulka:
Soldier, I've noticed that you're always last.



John Winger:
I'm pacing myself, Sergeant.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Cruiser:
I guess we're going after John and Russell. I can't believe they're Russian spies. Can you?



Psycho:
All I know is, finally I get to kill somebody.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
John Winger:
C'mon, it's Czechoslovakia. We zip in, we pick 'em up, we zip right out again. We're not going to Moscow. It's Czechoslovakia. It's like going into Wisconsin.



Russell Ziskey:
Well I got the shit kicked out of me in Wisconsin once. Forget it!

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Captain Stillman:
All right, soldier, let's see how you fire that mortar.



Soldier with Mortar:
What coordinates, sir?



Captain Stillman:
[annoyed] Coordinates?



Soldier with Mortar:
Yes, sir, they determine where the mortar's...



Captain Stillman:
Soldier, the army has spent a lot of money teaching you to fire that thing. Now set it and fire it.



Soldier with Mortar:
Sir, we don't know where the shell's gonna...



Captain Stillman:
Soldier. The only way to learn anything is to do it. Now fire the weapon.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Cruiser:
I joined the army 'cause my father and my brother were in the army. I figured I better join before I got drafted.



Sergeant Hulka:
Son, there ain't no draft no more.



Cruiser:
There was one?

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Psycho:
The name's Francis Sawyer, but everybody calls me Psycho. Any of you guys call me Francis, and I'll kill you.



Leon:
Ooooooh.



Psycho:
You just made the list, buddy. Also, I don't like no one touching my stuff. So just keep your meat-hooks off. If I catch any of you guys in my stuff, I'll kill you. And I don't like nobody touching me. Any of you homos touch me, and I'll kill you.



Sergeant Hulka:
Lighten up, Francis.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Russell Ziskey:
I've always been kind of a pacifist. When I was a kid, my father told me, "Never hit anyone in anger, unless you're absolutely sure you can get away with it." I don't know what kind of soldier I'm gonna make, but I want you guys to know that if we ever get into really heavy combat... I'll be right behind you guys. Every step of the way.

More Movie: Stripes [1981] Movie: Stripes [1981] [06/16/2016 01:06:42]

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