Q: What's the difference between Hillary
and a pit bull?
A: The pit bull doesn't carry a
briefcase.More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
Hillary Ramrod Clinton, Al
Gore, and Tipper Gore are flying aboard Air
Force 1 on their way to
visit the Communists to share their success
stories about taxing
Bill: "Why don't I throw this hundred dollar bill out
the window and
make someone very happy."
Hillary: "Well, why
don't you throw ten hundred dollar bills out the
window and make
ten people happy."
Al: "Why don't you two jump out the window
and make me and Tipper
Tipper: "Why don't we all jump
out the window and make everybody
throughout the United States and
world happy."More Aviation jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
How did Bill and Hillary Clinton
A: They were dating the same girl in high school.More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
Q: If Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, Al
Gore, and Tipper took a boat ride and the boat capsized, who would be
A: The United States of America!More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
Q: What kind of neckwear
Clinton look best in?
A: A noose.More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
Bill Clinton is visiting a school. In one
class, he asks the students if anyone can give him an example of a
One little boy stands up and offers "If my best
friend who lives next
door was playing in the street when a car came
along and killed him,
that would be a tragedy."
says, "That would be an ACCIDENT."
A girl raises her
hand. "If a school bus carrying fifty children drove
off a cliff,
killing everyone involved... that would be a tragedy."
not," explains Clinton. "That is what we would call a
The room is silent; none of the other children volunteer.
"What?" asks Clinton, "Isn't there any one here who
can give me an
example of a tragedy?"
Finally, a boy
in the back raises his hand. In a timid voice, he says:
airplane carrying Bill & Hillary Clinton were blown up by a
HAT would be tragedy."
"Wonderful!" Clinton beams. "Marvelous!
And can you tell me WHY that
would be a tragedy?"
says the boy, "because it couldn't be an accident, and it
would be no great loss!"More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
Q: How many Hillary Clintons
does it take
to change a light bulb?
A: One--she just holds the bulb and the
world revolves around her.More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
Hillary Clinton goes to
her doctor for a
physical, only to find out
that she's pregnant! She is furious. Here
just became the senator of
New York and this has happened to her.
She gets Bill on the phone and
immediately starts screaming: "How
could you have let this happen?
With all that's going on right now,
you go and get me pregnant! How
could you??!!! I can't believe this!
I just found out I am five weeks
pregnant and it is all your
fault!!! Your fault!!! Well, what have
you got to say???"
nothing but dead silence on the phone. She screams
again, "Did you hear
me??!!" Finally she hears Bill's very, very
quiet voice. In a
barely audible whisper, he says, "Who is
this?"More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
How did Bill and Hillary Clinton first
They were both dating the same girl in high school.More Clinton jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
An aircraft is about to crash. There are
five passengers on board, but unfortunately only 4 parachutes. The
passenger says, "I'm Shaquille O'Neill, the best NBA
player. The Lakers need me, it would be unfair to them if I
died." So he
takes the first parachute and jumps.
passenger, Hillary Clinton, says, "I am the wife of the
President of the United States. I am also the most dedicated woman
world, a Senator in New York and America's potential future
President". She takes one of the parachutes and jumps.
passenger, George W. Bush, says, "I am the President of the
of America. I have a huge responsibility in world
apart from that, I am the most intelligent President in the
the country and I have a responsibility to my people not to
So he takes a parachute and jumps.
The fourth passenger, th
e Pope, says to the fifth passenger, a ten year
old schoolboy, "I
am already old. I have already lived my life, as a
good person and
a priest I will give you the last parachute".
The boy replies
"No problem your Pope-ness, there is also a parachute
America's most intelligent President has taken my
schoolbag."More Political jokes Hillary Clinton [01/01/2018 12:01:01]
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