Vladimir Putin

Vladimir Putin

president of the Russian Federation
Russia is opposed to the proliferation of mass destruction weapons, including nuclear weapons, and in this context we call upon our Iranian friends to abandon the uranium enrichment programme.More Vladimir Putin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
Democracy is not possible without effectively working legal system.More Vladimir Putin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
The Cold War is over. The world has become much more complicated.More Vladimir Putin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
I'm sure corruption in Chechnya is minimal.More Vladimir Putin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
I don't think that neutrality is an obstacle to Austria's successful integration into European and world structures... but this is a question that the Austrian people themselves must decideMore Vladimir Putin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
Boris Yeltsin is retiring, and summons Komrade Vladimir Putin to his bedside. Wheezing his last few words with difficulty, Yeltsin tells Vladimir, "Komrade, the reins of the country are now in your hands. But before I go, I want to give you some advice."

"Yes, yes, Great Leader, what is it?" says Putin.

Reaching under his desk, Yeltsin produces two envelopes marked 1 and 2. "Take these letters," he tells Putin. "Keep them safely--don't open them. Only if the country is in turmoil and things start going badly, open the first one. That'll give you some advice on what to do. And, even after that, if things start going REALLY badly, open the second one." And with a sigh, Yeltsin leaves the office.

Well, Putin succeeded him, and sure enough, within a few years things started going badly--unemployment increased, hotels crumbled during Sochi, people became restless. Vladimir decided it was time to open the first letter. All it said was: "Blame everything on me!" So Putin launched a massive de-Yeltsin-Western campaign, and blamed the west and Yeltsin for all the excesses and faults and ills of the present system, and bought himself some time that way.

But things continued on the downslide--Viktor Yanukovych was removed in Ukraine, Crimea was taken, tensions increased, the EU was unhappy with Putin's leadership and upstarts like Nemtsov were threatening his credibility. So finally, after much deliberation, Putin opened the second letter.

All it said was: "Write two letters."More Jokes about Vladimir Putin [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
For dessert, we ordered Chocolate PutinMore Jokes about Vladimir Putin [01/02/2018 12:01:02]

Quotes of the month

Eugeny Antonuk Life is indisputable when it enters into an argument with death. [05/06/2019 03:05:59] More

Eugeny Antonuk Do not look for nonsense where just a habit. Do not seek wisdom where there is only cunning and insincerity. [05/07/2019 07:05:32] More

Anatoly Yurkin Faith in the Deep Space is more clingy than all other forms of philosophical graphomania. [05/06/2019 03:05:32] More

Eugene Ryabyi That, who has no taste is satisfied with anyone. [05/17/2019 06:05:09] More

Anatoly Yurkin For universal control of all team building demanded to be loyal to the control tools. [05/04/2019 12:05:01] More