Tommy Cooper

Tommy Cooper

English comedian
So I went to the Chinese restaurant and this duck came up to me with a red rose and says "Your eyes sparkle like diamonds". I said "Waiter, I asked for a-ROMATIC duck".More Tommy Cooper quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
So he said 'I'm going to chop off the bottom of one of your trouser legs and put it in a library.' I thought 'That's a turn-up for the books.'More Tommy Cooper quotes [10/04/2011 11:10:26]
I'm on a whisky diet. I've lost 3 days already.More Tommy Cooper quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
A blind bloke walks into a shop with a guide dog. He picks the Dog up and starts swinging it around his head. Alarmed, a shop assistant calls out: 'Can I help, sir?' 'No thanks,' says the blind bloke. 'Just looking.'More Tommy Cooper quotes [10/04/2011 11:10:41]
So a lorry-load of tortoises crashed into a train-load of terrapins, I thought "That's a turtle disaster".More Tommy Cooper quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]

Quotes of the month

Anatoly Yurkin Mistakes are the didactics of being. [09/30/2019 08:09:18] More


Jorge Amado Love is not to be proven or measured... It exists, and that is enough. [10/18/2019 10:10:02] More


Anatoly Yurkin It is not someone who digitizes something, but capital that reduces the cost of alienating intellectual property. [10/04/2019 04:10:38] More


Konstantin Krilov People admire things that in another place and at another time would disgust them. [10/18/2019 12:10:42] More


Eugene Ryabyi Only one who is incapable of loving can carry heart and soul through sinful earth without injury. [09/27/2019 09:09:34] More