A. Schwarzenegger has it long, Brad Pitt short, Madonna does not have it and the Pope does not use it. What is it?

Two, one to change the light-bulb, and one to observe how it symbolizes an incandescent beacon of...

One's a foiled boiler and the other's a boiled foiler.

I told him to stop because he never makes funny jokes.
His replay was - I made you didn't I?