owner

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owner

There was a castle called Doubting Castle, the owner whereof was Giant Despair.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Like Olympic medals and tennis trophies, all they signified was that the owner had done something of no benefit to anyone more capably than everyone else.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
To relive the relationship between owner and slave we can consider how we treat our cars and dogs -- a dog exercising a somewhat similar leverage on our mercies and an automobile being comparable in value to a slave in those days.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
One cause, which is not always observed, of the insufficiency of riches, is that they very seldom make their owner rich.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
If you are a dog and your owner suggests that you wear a sweater suggest that he wear a tail.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Learning is a treasure that will follow its owner everywhere.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Although men are accused of not knowing their own weakness, yet perhaps few know their own strength. It is in men as in soils, where sometimes there is a vein of gold which the owner knows not of.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
In England and America a beard usually means that its owner would rather be considered venerable than virile; on the continent of Europe it often means that its owner makes a special claim to virility.More [01/01/2000 12:01:00]
Ron: I'm warning you Hermione! Keep that bloody beast of yours away from Scabbers or I'll turn it into a tea cozy!
Hermione: It's a cat, Ronald! What do you expect? It's in his nature.
Ron: A cat? Is that what they told you? It looks more like a pig with hair if you ask me.
Hermione: That's rich! Coming from the owner of that smelly old shoe brush. It's all right, Crookshanks, just ignore the mean little boy.More [07/27/2005 12:07:00]
Dr. Evil: The details of my life are quite inconsequential... very well, where do I begin? My father was a relentlessly self-improving boulangerie owner from Belgium with low grade narcolepsy and a penchant for buggery. My mother was a fifteen year old French prostitute named Chloe with webbed feet. My father would womanize, he would drink. He would make outrageous claims like he invented the question mark. Sometimes he would accuse chestnuts of being lazy. The sort of general malaise that only the genius possess and the insane lament. My childhood was typical. Summers in Rangoon, luge lessons. In the spring we'd make meat helmets. When I was insolent I was placed in a burlap bag and beaten with reeds- pretty standard really. At the age of twelve I received my first scribe. At the age of fourteen a Zoroastrian named Vilma ritualistically shaved my testicles. There really is nothing like a shorn scrotum... it's breathtaking- I highly suggest you try it.More [08/06/2005 12:08:00]
Joan K.: I only like vegetarian lizards in terms of what I want to own as a pet owner because I like to get very physical with my animals, and I can't see kissing an animal whose got a mouse tail hanging out of its mouth - I'm not a vegetarian, but when they eat fruits and vegetables I feel more like I can kiss them and love them and hold them.More [10/18/2005 12:10:00]
Darius Stone: [Darius is speaking to Lola, a car shop owner and his ex-girlfriend, about the need for a new truck] Besides, if we're gonna roll, we're gonna need something with a little more muscle. Somethin' nasty.
Lola Jackson: [smirks] I can do nasty.
Darius Stone: [smiles at Lola] I know you can.More [10/20/2005 12:10:00]
Well you know, nobody likes to rock the boat in televeision and er.. Stephen Cannell who was the owner and co-creator of the series was prepared to replace thee people.More [11/20/2006 12:11:00]
Joe Fox: [while in Kathleens store buy books for his Brother and Aunt] May i ask who you are...?
Kathleen Kelly: [not realising that Joe is the owner of Fox Books that she is about to belittle] I'm Kathleen Kelly and this is my store... and you are?
Joe Fox: [now in full realisation that she does'nt know who he is, wanting to get out as fast as he can] Joe... Just call me Joe... I'll take these books...More [04/08/2007 12:04:00]
Patrick Bateman: [faking a conversation on the phone] Now, John, you've to wear clothes in proportion to your physique. There are definite dos and don'ts, good buddy of wearing a bold striped shirt. A bold stripe shirt calls for solid colored or discreetly patterned suits and ties.
[pause]
Patrick Bateman: Yes, always tip the stylist 15%. Listen, John, I've gotta go, T. Boone Pickens just walked in.
[laughs]
Patrick Bateman: Just joking. No, don't tip the owner of the salon. Okay John? Right? Got it.More [04/23/2007 12:04:00]
[the doctor, owner of dozens of cats, is coughing]
Doctor Pratt: I'm all right; it's just a fur ball; it's nothing. Strangely, I haven't had fur for a fortnight.More [05/20/2007 12:05:00]
Frances: [narrating] So I was now the owner of a villa whose lands it would take two oxen two days to plow. Owning neither an ox nor a plow, I'd have to take their word for that.More [06/15/2007 12:06:00]
Irv: I told the owner of the bar that these guys were mentally disturbed, so he's not going to press any charges.
Sanka Coffie: Yeah! Sled god does it again!
Irv: Shut up, Sanka.More [08/05/2007 12:08:00]
Brenda: Who are you?
Madea: Who you?
Brenda: I'm the owner of this house.
Madea: [buzzer sound] wrong answer, my grand daughter Helen is the owner of THIS house. You da hoe, you aint got no power or no deed.
Brenda: Did you do this? this is Vera Wang.
Madea: Who dat is? She do nails? I need to get my nails did.
Brenda: That's it I'm calling the police.
Madea: I aint scared a no po po. Call da po po hoe... Call da po po hoe.More [08/28/2007 12:08:00]
Madea: My grand-daughter Helen is the owner of this house. You the ho: you have no power or no deed.More [08/28/2007 12:08:00]
[closing credits; 1st ever Average Joe's commerical upon the takeover from Globo Gym]
Peter La Fleur: Hi. I'm Peter La Fleur, Owner and Operator of Average Joe's Gym. And I'm here to tell you, you're perfect just the way you are. But if you feel like losing a few pounds, gettin' healthier, and making some good friends in the process...
[hands a towel to a female member]
Peter La Fleur: ...then Joe's is the place for you. Don't forget that Youth Dodgeball classes are forming right now. So come on down and learn a great game the way it's supposed to be played. Right, kids?
Average Joe's Kids: Right!
[throws the balls at Peter and the team]More [09/17/2007 12:09:00]
Lee: [a knock on the door] Come in.
Tania: A gift Mr. Lee.
[pause]
Tania: If you don't see anything you like
[pause]
Lee: There was a girl at the feast tonight.
Tania: Which girl, sir?
Lee: The owner of this dart.
Tania: Oh, yes. I know the one. I'll send her to you.More [10/14/2007 12:10:00]
When I was 16, I walked into a magic shop, the owner demonstrated some tricks and I was absolutely blown away. I had seen magic on TV but never live, and I couldn’t figure it out. That started this thing, and that was 14 years ago.More [11/23/2007 12:11:00]
Cy-Kill: First we must come to an understanding.
[Produces Solitaire's power scepter]
Sticks: That's Solitaire's power scepter.
Stones: Yeah of course that's Solitaire's power scepter you dope.
Magmar: Give it to me.
Cy-Kill: I have something else for you the owner of this scepter to do with as you please.More [12/24/2007 12:12:00]
On a royal birthday every house must fly a flag, or the owner would be dragged to a police station and be fined twenty-five rubles.More [12/27/2007 12:12:00]
Building Announcement: Would the owner of the car with license number 1AG 401 please remove it from the CLAMP parking garage, your car is old, and dirty.More [01/13/2008 12:01:00]
[the owner of Mason Storm's former house enters a room where Storm has caused a mess]
Mason Storm: I'm sorry, but your contractor's doing a lousy job.More [02/04/2008 12:02:00]
Lars: [over speakers] Now, its time to meet your new owner and operator. Tony Perkis is a man who believes in you. His life is dedicated to saying things like "YES!" and "You better believe it!" Entrepenuer, a motivator, and a new friend! May I introduce, TONY PERKIS!More [03/03/2008 12:03:00]
Alice Bushkin: Harvey and I are saddened and dismayed to announce that we are no longer the owners of Camp Hope.
[the whole crowd gets shocked in disbelief]
Harvey Bushkin: Sometimes, in life, things don't work out the way you planned, and in those situations, sometimes you file chapter 9 bankruptcy.
[shreiks in agitation]
Harvey Bushkin: [struggling to get his voice] We worked our whole life, and what do we have to show? Nothing! Nothing! Nothing!
[sobs]
Alice Bushkin: Harvey, please stop.
[to the crowd]
Alice Bushkin: Okay, kids, out with the old, and in with the new.
[you hear some sobbing and shocks]
Alice Bushkin: Now, your new owner is gonna introduce himself in a minute. But, you know what I would like? Please, could you give us just one more Camp Hope "Hi, hi, hiya"?
Crowd: Hiya.
Alice Bushkin: God bless all of you.
Harvey Bushkin: One word of advice, NEVER LET ANYONE SIGN YOUR CHECKS!More [03/03/2008 12:03:00]
Mr. E.F. Duncan, Owner Duncan's Toy Chest: You see that tree there? Well to show our appreciation for youtr generosity, I'm gonna let you select an object from that tree that you can take home with you.
Kevin McCallister: For free?
Mr. E.F. Duncan, Owner Duncan's Toy Chest: Oh yes. May I make a suggestion? Take the Turtle Doves.
Kevin McCallister: I can have two?
Mr. E.F. Duncan, Owner Duncan's Toy Chest: Well, two Turtle Doves. I'll tell you what you do: you keep one, and you give the other one to a very special person. You see, Turtle Doves are a symbol of friendship and love. And as long as each of you has your Turtle Dove, you'll be friends forever.
Kevin McCallister: Wow. I never knew that. I thought they were just part of a song.
Mr. E.F. Duncan, Owner Duncan's Toy Chest: They are. And for that very special reason.More [03/22/2008 12:03:00]
[first lines]
Anchorwoman: After months of speculation, analysts expect an announcement this week that GlobeCom International will acquire Waterman Publishing and its flagship magazine, Sports America. The man at the helm of GlobeCom, billionaire media magnate Teddy K., has been on a spending spree recently, acquiring a food service company, a cable operator, and two telecommunications providers in deals totaling more than $13 billion. And how did one lucky ferret owner come to own the largest dog treat manufacturer on the East Coast?More [04/13/2008 12:04:00]
Burson Fouch: I remember in one flower shop there was a whole wall covered with poison ivy and people came from miles around to look at that wall and they stayed to buy.
Gravis Mushnik: And the owner got rich?
Burson Fouch: No, he scratched himself to death in an insane asylum.More [08/02/2008 12:08:00]
Doctor Edwards:
I am Dr. Edwards - the owner of this sanitarium.



Doctor Edwards:
We were overpowered and imprisoned here by my patients. Our lives are in constant peril.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[Tracks explains how he saved a youngster from a life of crime]



Tracks Williams:
I saved him from committing a dishonest act.



Laramie Nelson:
I don't doubt it. Go on with your story.



Tracks Williams:
Over in Colorado, Arledge took a right-sized herd of horses from a fella without the fella knowing it at that time.



Laramie Nelson:
And I suppose you talked him into giving them back?



Tracks Williams:
Well, I done even better than that. In order to make sure that the owner got them back, I took them horses myself. I started looking for that fella. But you know, I looked and I looked and I looked, and I never... I never could locate him. Finally, I had to sell them horses myself.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Charlie Chan:
Fingerprints very valuable if detective can catch owner of fingers.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[the new owner has shipped dozens of equipment crates to the ranch]



Frog Millhouse:
Well, I'll be hung for a horse thief. Soil testin' equipment. Encyclopedias. VTC and chemicals and poison. Well, who in blazes sent all this junk out here?



Gene Autry:
That's easy, our lady boss. She's goin' to an agricultural college and takin' animal husbandry.



Frog Millhouse:
Husbandry, huh? Well, it do beat all what a woman will do to get married.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
The Ranch Owner (Pop Lawson):
Seems to me that I smell something that should be buried - smells mighty like a polecat.



The Rich Uncle (Jim 'Tex' Preston):
Why, you!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Sgt. Archibald Cutter:
Eight feet away from where I'm sitting, right here, there's enough gold to make me sole owner and proprietor of a pub as big as the Crystal Palace. Best pub in Hampshire.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Sherlock Holmes:
Do you remember that missing boot, Watson? Why do you suppose the brown one, the one that had never been worn, was so mysteriously replaced and the black one taken?



Dr. Watson:
Why?



Sherlock Holmes:
Because the brown one would never have had the scent of the owner - and the black one had!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Joel Cairo:
I am prepared to pay five thousand dollars for the figure's return. Do you have it?



Sam Spade:
No.



Joel Cairo:
But if it isn't here, why did you risk serious injury to prevent my searching for it?



Sam Spade:
Why should I sit around here and let people come in and stick me up?



Joel Cairo:
But certainly it is only natural that I try to save the owner such a considerable expense if possible.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[a beauty shop owner is asked to identify a picture of Frances March]



Jean:
Looks familiar, but dearie, these blondes all bleach alike.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Fred Gailey:
Is it true that you're the owner of one of the biggest department stores in New York City?



Mr. R. H. Macy:
THE biggest!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
I hear you're a magician, Shawn. You can look at a yearling and tell like that whether he'll turn out champion or cow.



Shawn O'Hara, Seabiscuit's Trainer:
You exaggerate my abilities, George, but ...



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
But that's exactly why you're here, Shawn.



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
Oh, brother! Why, we can't even tell when they're two-year-olds. Even after we've tested them plenty against each other we sometimes let a future winner go to the sales.



Margaret O'Hara:
Perhaps you've let too many winners get away, Mr. Carson.



Shawn O'Hara, Seabiscuit's Trainer:
Now, Maggie, naturally George is doubtful.



Margaret O'Hara:
If it's proof you want, Mr. Carson, listen to this: In all the years Uncle Shawn trained for Lord and Lady Maitland in Ireland, devil a colt that turned the trick was sold by them.



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
All right, Miss Margaret. Let me in on the secret, will you?



Margaret O'Hara:
Of course. 'Tis simple. When it comes to a thoroughbred horse, Uncle Shawn is fey.



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
Fey? What's that?



Margaret O'Hara:
It has to do with the little people: elves, gnomes, fairies.



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
So we're going to have the fairies pick our horses for us. Well, I give up. Boss, you can have my resignation whenever you want it.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Of course not. Don't fly off the handle. You and Shawn will make a great team.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
You judge the next two or three, George. Shawn and I won't open our heads.



Shawn O'Hara, Seabiscuit's Trainer:
I'll not so much as whisper. I give you me word.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Come on with him.


[stable hand brings up Seabiscuit]



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
And that was bred here? What is it?



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
Seabiscuit by Hard Tack out of Swing On.



stable hand:
He's always been kind of runty.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Yeah. Runty's right. Look at those knees. Big enough for a three-year-old. Well, George, deciding about this one won't strain you.



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
Get him to the shipping paddock, quick.



Shawn O'Hara, Seabiscuit's Trainer:
One minute. Mr. Millford, I gave you me word, and you can call me what you like, but I'm going to have me say. I'm begging you, I'm praying you, don't let this little man go.



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
Well, can you beat that? Boss, I've stood for a lot here this morning, but if you keep this runty, big-kneed thing on the say of this Irish expert, I'm getting off the place.



Shawn O'Hara, Seabiscuit's Trainer:
Man, you don't know what you're saying. I'll leave, and gladly, to trouble you no more on one condition: give this colt a chance to show you what he can do.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Nobody's going to leave over one yearling. Shawn, I promised George, and I'm keeping my word. Shipping paddock.



Shawn O'Hara, Seabiscuit's Trainer:
The day will come, sir, when you'll hold your head higher and breathe deep to be called his owner.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
You die hard, don't you, Shawn.



Shawn O'Hara, Seabiscuit's Trainer:
I doubt if it's hard enough.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
I agree with you, Margaret, he should get to a warmer climate.



Margaret O'Hara:
Where should I be taking him for a warmer climate?



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
You'll go with him?



Margaret O'Hara:
Oh, indeed'n I will, sir.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Well, what about your nursing?



Margaret O'Hara:
I'll be nurse to him and him alone until he's well.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Well, then. I think we'd better make it California. Charlie Howard bought a stock farm out there. He could use a man like Shawn.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Did you buy anything?



Charles S. Howard, Seabiscuit's Owner:
No, but I'm going to buy one now, if you'll sell. I saw a three-year-old of yours running in a selling race this afternoon, smallish sort of colt with big knees, Seabiscuit.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Seabiscuit? Why do you want him?



Charles S. Howard, Seabiscuit's Owner:
Well, you can't shoot for the stakes all the time. I gotta have some horses for cheap races. He was entered for 6000. Will you take 8000 for him?



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Well, I think so. How about it, George?



George Carson, Head Trainer at Milford Farms:
The string's pretty large, boss. We've got a lot like him.



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
It's a deal, Charlie.



Charles S. Howard, Seabiscuit's Owner:
Good. We'll get him tomorrow. By the way, Tom, I hired Shawn O'Hara on the strength of your letter.


[Mr. Milford and George look at each other and laugh]



Charles S. Howard, Seabiscuit's Owner:
What's the joke?



Thomas Milford, Owner Milford Farms:
Oh, nothing. Only George and I know now why you want the Biscuit. And listen, Charlie, when you get him back to California, don't let Shawn stable him in the living room!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Martha, Owner of Martha's Cafe:
You know, I like places like this that specialize in good food instead of headwaiters.



Det. Sgt. Mark Dixon:
It's the worst food in town, but don't worry. They usually serve a stomach pump with the dessert.



Martha, Owner of Martha's Cafe:
Who invited you to come to my restaurant, Mr. Detective? Not me!



Det. Sgt. Mark Dixon:
Martha's the head of a ring of burglars. My presence makes her nervous.



Martha, Owner of Martha's Cafe:
Yeah, last night we got a whole basketful of diamonds. You wanna see?



Det. Sgt. Mark Dixon:
Bring us two of your dangerous dinners, Martha.



Martha, Owner of Martha's Cafe:
You know how much I've been offered to poison this man?



Det. Sgt. Mark Dixon:
Ten dollars.



Martha, Owner of Martha's Cafe:
That's right. I'm holding out for fifteen. Two dinners. Do you want wine?



Det. Sgt. Mark Dixon:
Bring a small bottle.



Martha, Owner of Martha's Cafe:
Huh! Same old cheapskate!



Morgan Taylor:
[after Martha leaves] She adores you, doesn't she?



Martha, Owner of Martha's Cafe:
She ought to. I sent her husband up.



Morgan Taylor:
Was he really a burglar?



Det. Sgt. Mark Dixon:
Wife beater.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
'Big' Jack Davis:
Rob the poor and you get a posse of outraged citizens after you. Rob a mine owner and nobody cares

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Don Lockwood:
Now listen, R.F., the owner of the Coconut Grove may do what Lina tells him to, but you're the head of this studio.



R.F. Simpson:
That's right, I'm the head of this studio. She's hired! But don't let Lina know she's on the lot.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Honest John Barrett, Owner Palace Saloon:
You don't come with the best recommendations - a temper and the son of a dead gunslinger.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[the town council asks Cass to resign]



Mr. Sam Bolton, Owner Boltons Emporium:
I hope you don't take this as a personal reflection on you, Cass.



Cass Silver, Marshal Flat Rock Kansas:
No, Sam, I don't. I take it as a personal reflection on you - all of you! The minute you people smelled money, this town got an attack of larceny. I don't blame it on Barrett; I blame it you. You're supposed to be respectable. You talk about law and order; you'd sell out for a copper penny - any one of you. You're robbin' and stealin' the same as he is, with your fifty dollar boots and your twelve dollar hotel rooms. If I was on this council, I couldn't look in the mirror without vomiting!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
George Washington McLintock:
Hello, Ben.



Ben Sage:
Hey, McLintock.



George Washington McLintock:
Drago, throw that in the buggy.



Ben Sage:
That's a scrubby bunch of sooners, eh?



George Washington McLintock:
They are at that.



Young Ben Sage:
Ought to make Douglas happy. Lining his pocket with land fees.



Ben Sage:
What are we gonna do?



George Washington McLintock:
I don't know what you're going to do, Ben. Me I do nothing.



Young Ben Sage:
Two hundred families. Quarter of beef a week per family. They last two years that could become a sizable number.



George Washington McLintock:
I've got 20 head to 1 of any other brand on the Mesa Verdi. I'm not hollerin'.



Young Ben Sage:
Some of us haven't got all the money in the world. Some of us aren't old and tired, feel like bein' put upon.



George Washington McLintock:
You interest me, young Ben. Go on.



Young Ben Sage:
So the first time I find one of our hides wearin' our brand hung on one of those settler's fences I aim to kill me a plow boy. You do what you want, McLintock, we'll do what we want.



George Washington McLintock:
Fellas my age generally call me G.W. or McLintock. Youngsters call me Mr. McLintock.



Young Ben Sage:
Alright. Mr. McLintock. Not because I'm afraid of ya. You're the big he stud of this country and I recon a fella my age should call you mister.



Ben Sage:
He's full grown now, G.W. He's half owner of the spread. I made him a full partner the day the doc gave me the long face.



George Washington McLintock:
Well, you want him to vote the first time this territory becomes a state, don't ya?



Ben Sage:
Course I do.



George Washington McLintock:
These settler's get burned out there'll be a lot of hollerin' that this country's too wild to be a state. We'll go on being a territory some more with a lot of political appointees runnin' it according to what they learned in some college where they think that cows are something you milk and Indians are something in front of a cigar store. I'm lookin' to you to hold young Ben down.



Ben Sage:
I'll do what I can.



George Washington McLintock:
Come on over to the house now and then. We'll rack up a few hands of stud.



Ben Sage:
G.W. that'll be just fine.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Edith:
You met the owner of the house. What's he like?



Rick:
It's difficult to say, really. He was half-hidden behind a table.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Fathom Harvill:
The name's Fathom Harvill.



Mike, Owner of Casa Miguel:
Fathom? How'd you get a name like Fathom?



Fathom Harvill:
It's short for Elizabeth.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Harry Leeds, Owner of Chez Harry:
Charlie, look! Charlie, look! They're making love, they're making love!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Mayor Ollie Perkins:
She's a rich little old gal in her own name, Sheriff. Sole owner of the Millard Frymore Memorial Mining Company.



Jason McCullough:
You meanin' whoever marries her gets the mine.



Mayor Ollie Perkins:
Shaft and all!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
[Michael says that Archie's friend Steve is gay]



Archie Bunker:
You are SICK, you know that? YOU NEED HELP. I've listened to this guy around here for ten months. All this pinko stuff, that's all right, that's what they're fillin' 'em up with in the schools nowadays, huh? The clothes, well, that's all right, they take from each other, one kid looks crummier than the next. Their wide-open sex any time of the day or night for no reason at all, that's all right, that's their submissive society. But when he goes besmearing - when he goes besmearing the name of a great line-backer, a second-choice all-American, a man, and I mean a REAL MAN, THEN YOU MIGHT AS WELL SHUT THE DOORS OF THIS COUNTRY AND HANG UP A SIGN, "CLOSED. OWNER GONE NUTS".

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
German Guest:
Can we help you?



Basil Fawlty:
Oh, you speak English.



German Guest:
Of course.



Basil Fawlty:
Ah, wonderful! Vonderbar! Ahh! Please allow me to introduce myself, I am the owner of Fawlty Towers. And may I welcome your war... your war... you all... and hope that your stay will be a happy one. Now, would you like to eat first, or would you like a drink before the war... AHH! Er... trespassers will be tied up with piano wire... SORRY, SORRY!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Eden:
Why would anyone want to cut out a man's tongue?



Raisuli:
Perhaps the previous owner had nothing pleasant to say.

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]
Bess:
Hold onto your hat. Vladimir Tserijemiwtz is Ezra C.V. Mildew Dezire Jr.!



Lou Peckinpaugh:
Wait a minute. Tserijemiwtz has two T's. The name you come up with don't have none.



Bess:
That was the whole key. Some people spell the Czar of Russia T-S-A-R. But in America we spell it C-Z-A-R.



Lou Peckinpaugh:
Any fool knows that.



Bess:
So when I tried the American spelling, I came up with Ezra...



Bess, Lou Peckinpaugh:
...C.V. Mildew Dezire Jr.!



Lou Peckinpaugh:
Of course! - Who the hell is he?



Bess:
The owner of the Golden Gate Bridge.



Lou Peckinpaugh:
Right. You did fine, angel. Now forget you ever heard that name. Don't ever repeat it to anyone.


[the phone rings]



Bess:
[into phone] Hello? - Yes, he is. Who's calling, please?


[to Lou]



Bess:
It's him! Ezra C.V. Mildew Dezire Jr.!



Lou Peckinpaugh:
I told you not to repeat it!

More [06/16/2016 01:06:42]

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Quotes of the month

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