List of Jokes

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Q: How many hardware folks does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None. That's a software problem.
A: None. They just have marketing portray the dead bulb as a feature.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How long will it take for a field service engineer to change a light bulb?
A: That's indeterminate. It depends on how many dead bulbs they've brought with them.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How long will it take for a field service engineer to change two dead bulbs?
A: They replace your fuse box.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How many Unix hacks does it take to change a light bulb?
A: As many as you want; they're all virtual, anyway.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How many APL hackers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. There's a primitive for that.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How many graduate students does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Only one, but it may take upwards of five years for him to get it done.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How many Bell Labs Vice Presidents does it take to change a light bulb?
A: That's proprietary information. Answer available from AT&T on payment of license fee (binary only).
A: Nearly unanswerable, since the one who tries to change it usually drops it, and the others call for a planning session.
A: Three. One to get the bulb and two to get the phone number of one of their subordinates to actually change it.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How many 'Real Men' does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None: 'Real Men' aren't afraid of the dark.
A: None of your damn business!More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How many 'Real Women' does it take to change a light bulb?
A: None: A 'Real Woman' would have plenty of real men around to do it.More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Q: How many Jewish mothers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: None. (''That's all right...I'll just sit here in the dark...'')More [01/02/2018 12:01:02]

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Quotes of the month

Anatoly Yurkin Science is a public institution that has nothing to do with the discoverer. (Anatoly Yurkin) [02/11/2021 02:02:20] More


Anatoly Yurkin The misunderstanding of the crowd is no more than one of the forms of creativity and self-realization of genius as an extraordinary thing. (Anatoly Yurkin) [02/21/2021 12:02:06] More


Egils Levits Those people who died from COVID, of course, will not have Christmas this year. [02/17/2021 10:02:27] More


Anatoly Yurkin The adaptability and flexibility of a digital solution is nothing more than a sales shell of a sought-after product. (Anatoly Yurkin) [02/24/2021 12:02:06] More


Anatoly Yurkin Avatar of Moscow. (Anatoly Yurkin) [02/22/2021 08:02:07] More