George Carlin

George Carlin

was an American stand-up comedian, social critic, actor and author, who won five Grammy Awards for his comedy albums.
The Golden Gate Bridge should have a long bungee cord for people who aren't quite ready to commit suicide but want to get in a little practice.More George Carlin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
All patriarchal societies are either preparing for war, at war, or recovering from war.More George Carlin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
Atheism is a non-prophet organization.More George Carlin quotes [07/10/2011 03:07:40]
Medical researchers have discovered a new disease that has no symptoms. It is impossible to detect, and there is no known cure. Fortunately, no cases have been reported thus far.More George Carlin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
Have you ever noticed that the only metaphor we have in our public discourse for solving problems is to declare war on it? We have the war on crime, the war on
cancer, the war on drugs. But did you ever notice that we have no war on homelessness? You know why? Because there's no money in that problem. No money to be made off of the homeless. If you can find a solution to homelessness where the corporations and politicians can make a few million dollars each, you will see the streets of America begin to clear up More George Carlin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
Some say rape isn't funny. Anything can be funny in the right context. Picture Porky Pig raping Elmer Fudd.
- George Carlin
More Jokes about George Carlin [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
Being a comedian is tough. Even when you write your own material, everyone accuses you of stealing from other comedians.

Jokes about airline food? Observational comedy? "You got that from George Carlin!"

One liners? "You can't do that, Mitch Hedberg does that!"

You tell a joke that sucks? "You definitely stole that from Dane Cook!"More Jokes about George Carlin [01/02/2018 12:01:02]

Quotes of the month

Anatoly Yurkin Decentralization scales to digital prosperity. (Anatoly Yurkin) [07/23/2019 06:07:23] More


Anatoly Yurkin Alienation is a creative vibration repeatability. [08/17/2019 09:08:27] More


Anatoly Yurkin Non-Fiat digital money makes up a public interface for exchanging signals with AI. (Anatoly Yurkin) [08/07/2019 07:08:43] More


Anatoly Yurkin Mistakes are the work of being. [08/03/2019 04:08:37] More


Anatoly Yurkin Meeting all the requirements of decentralization promises a scalability revolution. [08/14/2019 07:08:36] More