Navin R. Johnson: The new phone book's here! The new phone book's here!
Harry Hartounian: Boy, I wish I could get that excited about nothing.
Navin R. Johnson: Nothing? Are you kidding? Page 73 - Johnson, Navin R.! I'm somebody now! Millions of people look at this book everyday! This is the kind of spontaneous publicity - your name in print - that makes people. I'm in print! Things are going to start happening to me now.More Movie: The Jerk  Movie: The Jerk  quotes [05/03/2008 12:05:00]
Navin R. Johnson: Why are you crying? And why are you wearing that old dress?
Marie: Because I just heard a song on the radio that reminded me of the way we were.
Navin R. Johnson: What was it?
Marie: "The Way We Were."More Movie: The Jerk  Movie: The Jerk  quotes [05/03/2008 12:05:00]
Navin R. Johnson: [singing] I'm picking out a Thermos for you. Not an ordinary Thermos for you. But the extra best Thermos that you can buy, with vinyl and stripes and a cup built right in.More Movie: The Jerk  Movie: The Jerk  quotes [05/03/2008 12:05:00]
[Speaking to Marie in bed while she sleeps]
Navin R. Johnson: I know we've only known each other four weeks and three days, but to me it seems like nine weeks and five days. The first day seemed like a week and the second day seemed like five days. And the third day seemed like a week again and the fourth day seemed like eight days. And the fifth day you went to see your mother and that seemed just like a day, and then you came back and later on the sixth day, in the evening, when we saw each other, that started seeming like two days, so in the evening it seemed like two days spilling over into the next day and that started seeming like four days, so at the end of the sixth day on into the seventh day, it seemed like a total of five days. And the sixth day seemed like a week and a half. I have it written down, but I can show it to you tomorrow if you want to see it.More Movie: The Jerk  Movie: The Jerk  quotes [05/03/2008 12:05:00]
[Navin recites some wisdom]
Navin R. Johnson: Lord loves a workin' man; don't trust whitey; see a doctor and get rid of it.More Movie: The Jerk  Movie: The Jerk  quotes [05/03/2008 12:05:00]
The old age is the occupation of health by diseases. [06/17/2018 03:06:19] More
There are some poor countries where there is no space left for the truth. [05/24/2018 06:05:43] More
MAN... IS ABOVE HIS FATE. [06/15/2018 01:06:03] More
The price of human life depends on the value of a person to society. [05/23/2018 07:05:58] More
Aphoristics is the ability to place the mine of knowledge in one sentence. [05/23/2018 07:05:48] More