Vladimir Lenin

Vladimir Lenin

leader of the proletariat
Atheism is the natural and inseparable part of Communism.More Vladimir Lenin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
People always have been and they always will be stupid victims of deceit and self-deception in politics.More Vladimir Lenin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
The soundest strategy in war is to postpone operations until the moral disintegration of the enemy renders the delivery of the mortal blow both possible and easy.More Vladimir Lenin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
We want to achieve a new and better order of society: in this new and better society there must be neither rich nor poor; all will have to work. Not a handful of rich people, but all the working people must enjoy the fruits of their common labour. Machines and other improvements must serve to ease the work of all and not to enable a few to grow rich at the expense of millions and tens of millions of people. This new and better society is called socialist society.More Vladimir Lenin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
The Poor Peasants' Committees are necessary to fight the kulaks, the rich, the exploiters, who shackle the working peasants.More Vladimir Lenin quotes [03/29/2018 05:03:36]
**Marxist-Leninism:** You've probably defended the USSR in an internet argument. Everyone but you is dogmatic and sectarian and can't get over difference in ideology, especially the Anarchists.

**Democratic Socialist:** You're new to socialism, you get offended if you're called a Commie.

**Anarcho-Communism:** You've probably read the Conquest of Bread over five hundred times, you have a copy in every room. One's probably bound in FauxLeather™.

**Noam Chomsky:** You're peak liberal and believe petitions work. Why do you think you're an anarchist? What...what even?

**Trotskyism:** You like Lenin but think MLs are really authoritarian. You've probably made your own successor group to the 4th Internationale. All the leftists make fun of you behind your back. Including you.

**Maoism:** The same as Marxist-Leninism but you're even more of a tankie somehow, you probably at least passively support the DPRK.

**Hoxhaism:** Marxist-Leninism is revisionism, and so is everything else. Hoxha is love, Hoxha is life. Also no one can touch your dialectics, its hidden under seven thousand bunkers.
Georgism:What the fuck? You still exist?

**Social-Democrat:** You think you're a socialist, you're really, really not. You probably jerk it to the Nordic Model and say #FeelTheBern unironically.

**Post Leftist:** No you can't vape in here, get the fuck out of my office.More Jokes about Vladimir Lenin [01/02/2018 12:01:02]
An old Russian Jew, left behind decades ago when the rest of the family fled to Israel, had finally been granted permission to leave by the Soviet government. But not without a few last indignities. When he arrived at the airport, his luggage was confiscated and thoroughly searched in front of him. The customs officer, after going through his luggage, pulled out an eight pound sold metal bust of Lenin.

"What is this?" the customs officer demanded.

"What is this? What is this?! **Who** is this! This is Lenin, who dreamed of a better society for every Russian. Somewhere along the line," the old man said, wagging his finger at the young customs officer, "we lost our way. Lenin did not fail. We failed *him*. And as I go into the exile in a far off land, I take this with me to remind me of the ideal I must strive for." Chagrined, the officer replaced the bust and sent the old man on his way.

Sadly, the old man met with similar suspicion when he arrived in Tel Aviv. Again his luggage was searched. Again the bust was found. And again, he was questioned.

"What is this?" the customs officer demanded.

"What is this? What is this?! **Who** is this! This is Lenin, the bastard who ruined our country and drove millions of us into desolation and exile. This is Lenin, whose grasp of human nature was only exceeded by his inability to find his own ass with both hands. This is Lenin, whose bust I will place in my new home in the toilet so that every morning, I can give him the treatment he so richly deserves!" Chagrined, the officer replaced the bust and sent the old man on his way.

The old man finally made it to the small community where his relations had settled. He had a joyful reunion with long lost cousins and met all those distant relations he had only before known through censored letters. And joy of joys, he met his dear great granddaughter, child of the sister who had died under Lenin's rule so very long ago.

The girl was delighted with her new relation and helped him as he unpacked. "Grandpapa," she asked, pulling the bust from his suitcase. "Who is this?"

"Who is this? Who is this?! **What** is this! This, my dear child, is some lead paint and *eight pounds of solid gold*."More Jokes about Vladimir Lenin [01/02/2018 12:01:02]

Quotes of the month

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